1. Phoenix Mars Lander talks like a pirate
2. Lapti Nek playing over the speakers at a Nar Shadaa cantina in Force Unleashed. (And letting me now wear a Correllian flight suit as my outfit.)
Fanboy Moments for Today
1
Monthly Archives: September 2008
How to Improve Pro Sports #1: Laser Baseball
Any reader that has been around me at a sporting event has probably heard my theory within the past five years, but indulge me.
This sports entry is for Slade, who is taking a big test today.
E-mail subject: Suggestions for Improving Baseball’s Reach to a New Generation
Dear Bud Selig:
To be able to properly meet the demands of fans in a changing global economy, I believe that some changes need to be made to expand Major League Baseball’s demographic.Baseball players are not looked at as being as fit of athletes as other sports players, such as basketball and football players. A means of proving their determination must be provided. Equip each baseball outfit with a low impedance transformer and an external sensor. Also, give everyone on defense a low-divergence laser gun that has a two second burst and a battery that must be recharged through kinetic energy.
As a runner is approaching a base, the defenders can fire upon the runner. The runner’s sensor, if hit by the laser, triggers the low impedance transformer. I believe that Starter brand team outfitters has the ability to manufacture a transformer with a 1000 ohm output, much like what is found in current shock collars to inhibit dog barking. Runners will have to push even harder through more difficult muscle spasms to reach the bag, proving their determination and sportsmanship. To make things fair, after the 7th inning stretch the runners can also be equipped with laser guns.
Adding on to the excitement would be on fan nights when fans would be given laser guns, as well. I believe that a generation growing up on first person shooters would appreciate a gun more than that little bat that they get that technically wouldn’t even qualify as a back-up inventory weapon if your ammo ran out. Also, fans could be made to wear the shock uniforms and could fire their lasers across the stadiums. Finally we could end the rivalry between the Seattle Mariners and the Detroit Tigers.
Thank you for your time and consideration. I appreciate any feedback.
Sincerely,
A Fan
I sent this e-mail to him today. If he doesn’t respond back, I could send him a letter at:
The Office of the Commissioner of Baseball
245 Park Avenue, 31st floor
New York, NY 10167
USC
Is USC a big football school? Recruiters were talking to my brother-in-law.
My frustration with the campaign, as illustrated by economics
Woot, David Weidner:
Listen to the Democrat talk about Wall Street, and you’ll hear what the Republican thinks and be told that the crisis is the Republican’s fault.
Listen to the Republican talk, and you’ll hear him call the economy “fundamentally sound,” blame Wall Street’s woes on “unbridled corruption and greed” and propose the formation of a commission.
Sorry, guys, but how about a plan?
[Obama's] talked about strengthening capital requirements on mortgage securities and derivatives, rigorously managing liquidity risk, and investigating ratings agencies and their potential conflicts of interest with companies they rate.
There’s not much to criticize there, and that’s the problem. Obama is echoing what people in the current administration — people like Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson and Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke — have been saying. There’s nothing new. Obama’s “plan” is a bunch of warmed-over ideas.
…
Aside from his idea to create a 9/11-style commission to find out what went wrong and propose changes, McCain wants a safety-and-soundness regulator for every financial institution.
Again, that’s not bad, but it’s hardly radical.
Theory is great, but can I see some steps?
It seems to me like our obsession with information is creating a panic, in all honesty. Not that I’m saying we should just let it ride, but we also shouldn’t just freak out.
And: should we give tax incentives to people who save more than they spend?
And what would it look like if every American just pitched in $5 bucks to keep the economy from collapsing?
“And Another Thing…”
New Hitchhiker’s book?
Another one for the grandparents
My wife and I were talking about short and long term missions and Mexico and my oldest said, “Silly. You can’t go. You don’t even know the language!” I proceeded to tell her (in Spanish) that we were alright. I even got to work in an “Y tu mama tambien”.
My youngest is also learning a language:
- Bear
- Night Night
- Mama
- Baby
It should be noted for the non-grandparents that my first words were “Battlestar GEEYactica”. Slade’s was “Ball”.
Ball, Bear, Battlestar GEEYactica – Where have I heard this before?
BoruBarBand – Vote for the Loveblisters
My friends Rob and Jess (note to Mike: Jess from “Tina and Jessica” at NAU) are currently number one in a battle of the bands competition.
Vote for the Loveblisters at borubarband.com.
What do you get? You can download a track from one of their albums.
Why I’m glad Force Unleashed is not 1:1 motion sensitive
Why are you waving you hand around like that? What, you think you’re some kind of Jedi or something?
We’re not Jedi.
Nor are most Star Wars fans trained/coordinated enough to hang with another Force user in combat. The result of 1:1 would be even more flailing/a wagglefest (wagglefest being IGN’s word, even though they had a lot of fun. I agree that the camera and graphics are annoying, but the controls and immersion are awesome and make up for the shortfalls for me. And the storyline is great Star Wars, as mentioned before.).
The controls definitely do not feel limited. I can chain together combos at will, mixing in Force powers to spice it up/advance subplots I write in my head. It feels a lot like the combat from Jedi Academy and I’m okay with that. (I liked it.)(Jedi Academy was released on Sept. 16? Interesting.)
If you’re one of my graphic design/typography friends, though, you won’t like the instruction manual. No grammar errors upon first glance, but what caught my attention was that they printed all of the screenshots at too dark of a contrast. Many times it’s just a black box with a bright line (lightsaber) in the middle.
These are just some additions to my first impressions as I sit at work. Waiting.
Today is Vans day. I have a picture of the A-Team vehicle attached to my lanyard. Perhaps not the initial intent of the spirit day.
Funny librarian patron stories real quick:
- A student walked up to me today, no introduction, just, “If you have a problem, and if you can find them, maybe you can call…”
- A couple of days ago a student walked up to the desk wearing the inner workings of a wall clock and clock hands on a giant chain. I told him it was awesome, since it still kept time. I also told him he couldn’t be late to anything. This is a continuation of junior high library fashion.
Force Unleashed First Thoughts
On this, our 1,112th post, you may be surprised that I’m talking about Star Wars.
For my non-Star Wars readers, you should know that when I tried to print author photos, my wife’s grandma had to walk me through the process of setting up the photo paper and printer buttons correctly.
Since it’s all flipped, know that when I say Light Side I mean all things good about Star Wars, like Wookiees.
By Dark Side, I mean all signs of George Lucas dementia, like showing a wampa eating, the Life Day celebration, and the entire population of Naboo.
Dark Side
- Camera unleashed – still figuring out how to lock onto characters effectively.
- I guess Sith operate all electronic devices by using a lightsaber as a stylus
- General Kota’s non-moving mouth – “Hey, kid, don’t be like Vader. And, um, oil can…”
Light Side
- Starting out the game as Vader – usually it’s something that you work towards, but once the first cutscene is done you are the Dark Lord of the Sith crushing a Wookiee rebellion; pillars and ryyk blades go flying
- Using the Wii remote to slash down troopers –
Meesa likin’ da slashinsYubjub! - Lining up and tilting the nunchuck to the onscreen prompt actually works – and if you succeed, the Apprentice busts out some Yoda versus Dooku moves
Useful Links for Blogging
In exchange for knowledge of Dropbox, I will provide FreedomFighter, a new blogg(h)er, links with hints about blogging.
37 Viral Post Ideas
101 Essential Blogging
Blogging about blogging. How incredibly quaint.
Cephas Dexbane
“No longer just a name and number.”
Movie trailer promoting my friend who I predict will be the next big action star:
He raised $0.61 in funding from this project.
Director’s commentary:
At 1:01, he is only taking off the slippery covers.
At 5:31 there is a definitive “Does he actually tear it in half or not?” answer.
By the way: 9 hours until my 2 year wait is over. (I guess I have to wait until I get home to play Force Unleashed, though.)
One small step for colorblind people, one small stumble for bad spellers
Groovin’ Blocks, a game where you get bonus points for dropping colored squares to the rhythm of the music, has a feature surprisingly left out of most puzzle games.
Colorblind Mode
It turns the colored squares into different shapes.
IGN was looking for editors a while back. It looks like spellcheck took a vacation in the interim.
Wii Music? Not too exciting, but it will end up being genius. Bad spelling and an Internet meme? Like PB and J.
DC vs. Marvel: Fruit Snack Edition
For any grandparents brave enough to even consider reading an article titled this, I reward you.
Football season is here. Sometimes a barbarian’s just gotta grill while wearing a football jersey and an apron picturing a skull of some type of cattle…thing.
Marvel vs. DC
To get the biases out of the way – Batman is my favorite superhero, but once you start talking rich universes I’m more of a Marvel guy. Exception: Flash is cooler than Quicksilver, although Quicksilver has a cooler lineage.
But what about the fruit snacks?
It should be noted that Marvel first produced the Transformers comic books.
To start, let’s go supervillains:
Joker (left) vs. Green Goblin (right)
Both are fans of purple and green. Both are insane. Both are globs of modified corn starch and fruit juice concentrate. Maybe not a good place to start. It looks like they weren’t even trying.
The “white flavored” snacks are arranged in order of coolness. The insignia from the movies/batarang. Woot.
Next, a spiderweb. I’m diggin’ it, but it could be left over from Dora the Explorer Halloween Snacks. (We never had them (I loathe the undead), although the Dora Saves the Mermaids ones are tasty.)
But what’s up with the Third Reich covered truck bed Transformer? It’s like the Scion-wannabe Chevy Groove or whatever that ugly spawn of a Sith-corrupted PT Cruiser is that’s driving around. Nissan, just don’t.
Let’s look at the “blue flavored” snacks. Venom is really cool, but his tongue-lash does not an appetite make. Optimus is great, but his faceplate and pronged sideburns don’t stand out.
The Batman bust sticks out. The snack is deeper than it is wide, so you have to flip it to see the picture straight on. I like it.
Yellow. Mangled Bumblebee face or clear insignia? Insignia.
Evidence that the Batman fruit snacks are cooler than the Spider-man and Transformers ones combined. (Photographic play on words in memory of Brenda.)
In conclusion, DC (in this instance) beats Marvel and Libya remains a land of many contrasts.
My daughter was kindof shocked by the sacrifice required by science of her fruit snacks:
In an unrelated story, my wife went with my sister-in-law to go see Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2 during lunchtime…
A quote, a picture, and an ethical question about Wookiees
I mean, what more do you need in a bloggh?
First, the quote
Donald Miller’s Blue Like Jazz. Yes, I’ve read it before. I’m re-reading it, and for a “I need to read the latest teen fiction” librarian that’s crazy because I can only think of three other times that has occurred: the multiple class readings of literature (16 times (3 block classes x 5 years + 1 on my own) worth of Diary of Anne Frank, The Outsiders, Watsons go to Birmingham, and multiple short stories)), stuff by C. S. Lewis, and To Kill a Mockingbird (okay, so through the big three of Shakespeare in, as well).
I guess it can be determined that I still read a lot. But Blue Like Jazz deserves coming back to.
Here’s a part of what I read today:
Loneliness is something that came with the fall. If loving other people is a bit of heaven then certainly isolation is a bit of hell, and to that degree, here on earth, we decide in which state we would like to live. Rick told me, a little later, I should be living in community. He said I should have people around bugging me and getting under my skin because without people I could not grow – I could not grow in God, and I could not grow as a human.
Pick up a copy. When I read the book, it feels like my soul is sitting in the perfect recliner eating a Hot Pocket*.
Thank you to the Star Wars guys, the sidewalk drivers, and my family. You are appreciated.
Next, the picture
Before I continue, you should know that I am feeding my youngest while snacking. I have to tell you that the new Batman fruit snacks are way cooler molding than the Spider-man and Transformers ones combined.
This one was sent in by Danjo today:
In our media-saturated world, polls and commentators and all that, have we matured much?
I, of bloggher persuasion, am the chief of sinners. Yet, one should know, I have hit information overload. I wonder how many of us in Generation Jaded (or whatever we are) are truly really excited and hopeful about the election results, either way.
And finally an ethical question
Wookiee Jedi (Force Warrior variant). (Yes, I know that’s not a question.)
Correct – this is a random picture from the Internet and not me.
Rage is a racial bonus. If my Wookiee is in the middle of combat and acts out of Rage, is he being tempted by the Dark Side? Is it in his nature as a Wookiee and he must fight it to hone his Force training or will he not gain any Dark Side points while adding +2 to damage and attack rolls?
No, I’m serious.
*Results may vary.
Rare Unicorn on my Trapperkeeper
Okapi in the wild:
In another showing of her talent, Lisa Frank has a new product line on the market:
The rarest part of the whole story?
When interviewed, the okapi had no idea who Obama or Palin were.
Fact: Okapi are politically apathetic.
Slade – what has happened to LucasArts?
Check out these great articles cataloging the history of Star Wars Games. Especially check out where they started (I never played ‘Empire’, but I remember going crazy in the vector graphics Death Star game at Disneyland), where they went wrong, and where they’re at now.
Devin – Can I get a “Wooha!” for X-Wing? I think you and I (and Stackpole) are the only ones who remember that game. Booyor secret: I loaded that game and TIE fighter on the Learning Center computers at our high school and played them after school.
Also check out the extensive coverage at GameTrailers.
This will make you cry. Tom, I remember celebrating Jedi Knight Release Day in college.
What about Bob? ’08
Is this guy still in it? I find him refreshing…mainly because no one’s talking about him and Fantasy Election League has no hype on him.
Bob Barr, huh?
I also find it interesting that neither Obama nor McCain filed for the Texas ballot by the deadline – 70 days before the election (Texas Election Code ยง 192.031). That was Aug. 26, 5pm.
Texas doesn’t count.
It’s also good to hear that no black holes formed today, but that’s simply because no particles were collided. That comes in a few days. Then we panic.
Much like Proverbs 26:11, I sat down to play Gyrostarr again last night. It did me in.
Mike: The Next Generation
So good, he gets a sequel. Congrats on the new addition, Mike!
For everyone else – now we have a chance to win Fantasy Football. Quick, while Mike’s distracted.
Here’s how Mike does:
Yeah, most people who won had around 160-180 points. Nope, 206 for Mike.
And thanks, Dad, for the Vince Young tip! (just messing with you) For those not into football (like me, if there’s no one I know on the field) here’s a glimpse of what happened to my QB this week:
Tue, Sep 9 WKRN Nashville reports the Tennessee Titans were concerned about QB Vince Young (knee) during the evening of Monday, Sept. 8, that they called police to try and locate him. Metro police officers and head coach Jeff Fisher gathered at the team’s facility early Tuesday, Sept. 9, to meet with Young after trying to locate him. According to sources, questions about Young’s state of mind began when Young left his home abruptly Monday, Sept. 8. According to the same sources, Young seemed emotionally down and left his cell phone behind. Team officials alerted Metro police to be on the lookout for Young’s SUV.
First Terrell Owens murders an entire star system, now this! Can I ever have a team not from the Prison Colony Intramurals!?
It’s okay. David Garrard is my back up QB.
These guys can survive in space without a suit.
Their only weakness? Loneliness.
And asteroids. Fact: Tardigrades HATE asteroids.
Fun Stalkings of P. J. Haarsma
The author visit was great. Here are some quick observations:
- I asked him a “Duh” question: “Did you watch Dr. Horrible?” His response: “Well, yeah, I designed the van’s remote control.”
- He incorporates some cool astronomy into the presentation. He had kids standing with models of planets and used a one foot=one hundred miles scale to span the library. He even quizzed kids on the speed of light and Proxima Centauri.
- He, too, was intrigued by the cover of Generation Dead and cracked up when I told him the concept.
- He also smirked when I admitted to the Haiku Project.
- He knows his audience. He started the presentation with a fist in the air: “Long live Halo!”
- Lots of cool artwork in giant banner form, done by concept artists from Warhammer and Star Wars
- He does all of his own site design, including the Flash movies. I was like, “Okay, yeah, that’s cool” until we started chatting about After Effects and ActionScript. Yeah, he actually did the site design.
- Great stories from his childhood and a great closer to his presentation. (Sworn to secrecy, much like Ally’s title to Gallagher Girls 3.)
- Alan Tudyk (Wash from Firefly) reads chapter one of book two on thesoftwire.com (if you can answer the question correctly)
- He told us about Book 3: Pirates of Hyperspace. Pirates, Hyperspace…what more does a guy need?
- He is upset by peoples’ assumptions that boys/guys don’t read.
- He is more of a Mac addict than myself and the Futile Ohm put together.
Pictures tomorrow (as long as people don’t go as crazy as they did today).