This video would be more intense if the bite didn’t sound like it came from a Hanna Barbera cartoon.
Or is Polar Bear vs. Walrus more your thing?
I knew that there were catfish that could breathe out of the water – but I didn’t know they were killers. Oh, I guess the flatulent sound they make is killer.
A piraiba catfish gets so ticked it growls at you. Like taking an arapaima to the chest. How come Nook didn’t warn our Animal Crossing friends?
I heartily endorse this trope. (My youngest thinks this looks like me.)
You may know of “jumping the shark”, named after Fonzie risking his life on water skis because Happy Days had run longer than it should have.
“Growing the beard” is when a series matures and gains in quality as the seasons go on. This is tough to do. I have trouble thinking of many shows that do this. I hear that Dollhouse is one, but I haven’t got there yet. We just started watching Sliders on Hulu.
I do agree that Next Generation did this. To some extent The Simpsons were there but I feel are regressing.
Ah! Chuck. Chuck definitely got better as they got closer to being canceled. Heroes, why can’t you be like your younger brother? We’ll see if Chuck can keep it up with the programmed kung fu and the goofy forearm computer.
Lost is growing the beard, as well, but I think that’s because the writers finally outlined the story.
A Pandora advertisement from Miracle Whip just interrupted my writing process. I guess as an ad campaign to prove just how zingy they are, Miracle Whip has created an application that tags other pages with your comments for your Facebook friends to see. I know that there are other apps out there that do that, apps that will probably not crash your browser and/or give you bad cholesterol, so I’m wondering why this stands out as an ad campaign that people will use.
I don’t even use the well-written apps. I’m one of those weirdos who leaves actual comments.
Oh! Zing!
TVTropes knows what we know – that every mega-villain needs to have an alternate form and needs to be accompanied by Latin chanting.
A monkey controlling a robot with its mind. I think that’s all that needs to be said.
I’m assuming you’ve seen TV Tropes. This has replaced wii.ign.com as my “type it into the browser immediately”. Should make it easier to save money and I might even have some fun playing with this for the next novel. It’s pretty funny that the next book I’ve been thinking about is to make fun of fantasy cliches (Eragon, anyone?) and then this site walks into my life.
The trouble is I may not be able to tear myself away from the reference joke geek tractor beam that it is.
You may recall my obsession with Toto’s Africa after the Jeffster episode of Chuck. This has now been exploded by a combination of my friend Lauren and my Howard Shore/Vangelis Pandora station.
I present to you an a capella group singing Africa (mixed with an elementary school rain-finger-snaps-thing):
This video should tide you over until Glee this fall:
“Well you can tell by the way I use my walk…”
I read the rumor mill that Heroes has a new villain. A guy named Simon with a British accent. Really? Should we expect tight black T-shirts? He’s said to be very manipulative.
Accent + Manipulative = Linderman
Sorry, writers. You have exhausted your own trope.
Today marks four years of the bloggh.
1,542 posts
2,331 comments
That’s crazy! And not all of those comments were from me.
If you remember back to the first bloggh post, Vafer had set up the site for me after watching me agonize through updating HTML manually and re-uploading files every time I had a thought.
Can you imagine that mess during something like Chuck or Lost?
It’s really cool to look back. Vafer is now helping me with the internal graphic design work for my novel. (A novel which is now entering the revisions stage!!)
And J – I think MacGruber’s picture is copyrighted. We may have to create an alternate book cover.
I will say that this novel is definitely inspired by my favorite era of the bloggh:
My writing improved
With the challenge of posting
One haiku a day
It seems crazy that just a year ago I was tossing around what my next challenge would be.
Me: Oh, I don’t know. Perhaps write a 200 page novel entirely in poems involving bartitsu and buzzsaw robots? Why not?
What’s really encouraging is that some authors have mentioned that most people only have three novels in them. I have the current one, but I’m already thinking through another book. (No, this is not a sequel, although one is tempting. Vafer is right…it does have the elements of a series. How I view it is like the first Star Wars movie. Luke blew up the Death Star and the Rebels won. If no other movie was made, it still stands on its own.)
But the next book I’ve got bubbling through my synapses has me even more pumped. I don’t think it will be in verse, though. It took me a year to write this first book. I think I could have written the book twice in the same time if I hadn’t had to line up rhythms, rhymes, and make sure it all makes sense…and is interesting.
The bloggh has been great and I appreciate everyone’s help. Just knowing that you’re reading helps me to write each day.
Is that exhibitionist? Nothing’s worth doing if I don’t have an audience?
Dad, have things changed much? Has the little boy who watered Grandma’s painting with a garden hose in the living room really matured?
I think I have four years of evidence compiled. Whether it’s in my favor or not is left to the spirit of the law versus the letter of the law. Good ol’ Charles de’ Secondat, right?
I love the bloggh. Where else can references to 18th century philosophers sit next to pictures of the L.A. Lakers and dancing cats?
I think back to some of my favorite articles posted by other people: the Open Letter to G.I. Joe, the HSM3 review, and the complete library of 80s references as metaphors for the NBA.
There are some other posts that stand out, like how Jesus Rejects Norm got some great in-person comments/discussions and how the Cutesy category helps the grandparents sift through all of the video game hullabaloo.
Thanks to everyone for putting us into your weekly routine.
In conclusion: Libya is a land of many contrasts, Eat Your Fight, and Fonzie’s been cloned!
I’ve had some interesting conversations over the past few weeks debating and analyzing trades, free agent prospects as well as just how I never thought I’d see the day when the Cardinals would be the team that gives Arizona sports fans the most hope for a better day. I was recently in a heated debate with a friend about the future of Lakers Free Agent Lamar Odom and how it would relate to the newest acquisition of Ron Artest when somehow another friend worked the new age artist ‘Enya’ into the conversation, stating that Ron Artest better start listening to Enya because that’s all the kind of stuff that Lakers coach Phil Jackson believes in. Then the conversation got even weirder when my friend said that he thought Enya was “hot” and that he wanted to marry her. When he said that, this picture immediately came to mind:
As the conversation progressed I felt the need to beg the question, “Man are you serious about all this?” followed by, “She’s crazy, have you heard the music she creates? Do you realize how weird that crap is? If I was married to her, I’d be afraid that in the middle of the night I might wake up from a sound sleep to see her draping herself in sheets dancing around the room while covering her face with paint singing ‘Sail away sail away sail away..” He then responded with, “yeah that would be weird wouldn’t it…but man it’s ok cause it all shows her creativity and free spirit… I respect that.” After an awkward pause, we moved on back to talking about free agency soon following that.
Ah….what NBA Free Agency does to the sports fan’s mind….
And the last thing I’ll leave you with is the reaction the rest of the NBA had once they learned that Ron Artest had signed on with the LA Lakers:
I’m almost done with the first draft of the book. Just a few more pages. I would apologize for the posts consisting of random bursts of Internet junk, but isn’t that what the bloggh is normally?
Today’s Pandora randomness comes from the Howard Shore/Danny Elfman/Vangelis station. (Yeah, you’d need that type of station if you had to write a scene where your main character is dying alone…wait…have I revealed too much of the plot? Sorry for the spoiler.)
Here’s the great song that accompanied my writing:
and then this comes on:
Gotta love free Internet radio.
If you liked the LEGO cello, then you’ll love this:
Performing the musical Hair [rimshot].
Mandalorians are rumored to be in the live action Star Wars show coming up. That would be really easy costuming, comparatively speaking. George Lucas is supposed to be at San Diego Comic Con, so we’ll see if there are any big announcements.
Warning: Don’t watch this video before bed. I love Japanese advertising.
The double guns remind me of Jango Fett.
To prepare for this, you need to watch a new version (reboot?) of bears, beets, Battlestar Galactica.
Tim Minear, who worked on Firefly and Dollhouse, is rebooting Alien Nation, the cop show that I loved because it explored racism through the eyes of an alien buddy cop drama (and the aliens got drunk on sour milk…that’s funny).
But what should grab even more readers’ attentions is Syfy’s other show (you remember Siffy, right?). Since Battlestar Galactica was a success, why not bring back a darker version of Quantum Leap? Scott Bakula’s on the Orion updraft.
Once you’ve done a billion points of damage, everything else is hyperbole.
Capcom vs. games, you make me laugh. Your instruction manuals promise “combos” but all I see are “flailings”. At least you’re not modifying the experience for Wii. Stay true to your insanity, Ryu. Stay true. (How old is that guy, anyways? I remember Slade and I counting quarters to buy the Super NES game. Before that, I remember playing the game in the lobby of a hotel in Disneyland.)
I’m convinced that Yours Forever would be a great fit for Freedom.
Am I the only one that think this sounds like Australian punk? Sounds like a fun bass part.
Jerry Bruckheimer may have his G-Force (guinea pigs that are covert ops…I have known that Bruce Willis was one for some time now). But we are pet-sitting the prodigy Ludwig van Ruffles.
The past couple of days worth of writing I’ve felt like this guy:
“Oh. That would be good. Wait. What was that again?”
And now for the much-requested Cute Swarm (Slade – Cuteaga if it were Final Fantasy…send that joke over your head, Dad):
Many thanks to the readers who have stuck with me when they had no clue what I was talking about. Your efforts shall be rewarded with more kid photos/cute anecdotes.
Don’t fret, fellow weirdos.
There will still be dancing cats.
I just got done formatting 100 pages worth of a rough draft. Woo! To reward myself, I found this Japanese ad for the samurai part of Wii Sports Resort. It sure beats how many times my thumbs bled getting hit by shinai. (Yes, and I did get clocked in the head yesterday by a Frisbee and yes I know it’s very Goliath-ironic.)
The loser falls on his own Wiimote in shame.
I don’t like fireworks.
Yes, I do understand that with such an un-American statement I’ve now been added to the NSA’s watchlist for possible insurgency, but I’m pretty sure my research for my novel has already tipped off the ATF to my bings.
Wow. Never before had I considered working at the NSA, but their website looks very friendly. Wait a minute. Even Sudoku bugs me. Nevermind. But now that I’ve linked to their site, the NSA is now bugging me. [rimshot]
The thing with fireworks is that you have to wait around in the heat for a very long time for only 15 minutes worth of entertainment. In many ways it has a Disneyland thing going on, but without all of the clacking animatronics and Hungry Bear burgers.
So, if you are like me and detest axilla overload of the apocrine glands, here are some tips to avoid thinking about what kind of sweaty beast you have become.
Aaron Burr
Benjamin Franklin
Franklin Delano Roosevelt
Elephant crushes human, human crushes ant, and ant kills elephant by entering its trunk.
Check out the Ultimate Chart as a reference:
No matter how you celebrate, whether seeing fireworks live or via PBS:
Happy Independence Day!
(Why do fireworks have to start so much later than bedtime?)
Rainn Wilson’s dad owns a contemporary art gallery, showing off his own stuff among other artists. Usually I’m pretty lenient with my views on art, but I’m a little bit argh that for $1800 you can get something that looks like my youngest drew it.
It’s like the quiz about whether it’s a painting done by a pre-schooler, an elephant, or famous artist:
Test your artistic instincts with this fun quiz! But first, a little about our artists:
Jean Miotte is a semi-famous contemporary artist who resides in New York, NY. Her work is displayed in many private galleries, and a few public galleries, including the famous Guggenheim Museum. She expresses herself with gestural brushstrokes and thick color pools, inspired by her inner conflicts.
Jackson Pollock was an influential American artist and a major force in the abstract expressionism movement. By the mid to late 1940′s he developed a painting method which made him famous: dripping paint on large flat canvasses to create expressions of “unconscious imagery”. Jackson Pollock died in Long Island, New York, in a car accident.
Kamala the elephant resides in the Calgary Zoo in Alberta, Canada. Kamala expresses her mood through a form of “finger (or, should we say, trunk) painting”, using custom made brushes onto an easel mounted canvas. Some of her paintings have sold for over 2,000 dollars!
Ian Ford is a preschooler from the United States. He likes to eat paste (just kidding).
Take a look at the paintings below and guess the artist! You can click on each painting for a larger view. Scroll to the bottom of the page for the answers.
A.
B. 
C. 
D. 
E. 
F. 
G. 
The answers?
Answers To Quiz:
A. Jackson Pollock B. Kamala the elephant C. Jean Miotte D. Kamala the elepant E. Ian Ford, Preschooler F. Ian Ford, Preschooler G. Jackson Pollock
I cleaned up the quiz from this site.
This video summarizes my thoughts on how much of an uphill battle Bing has to become a household/junior higher friendly name. Here’s a more detailed explanation of what I’ve seen.
Because we all need motivation to buy the best-selling console out there right now.
This is what I feel like the majority of the companies view the Wii as. It shows by how the majority of games are developed. “Well, this sold. So how about throwing in a squirt gun and calling it good?”
How many carnival game collections does one system need? I’ve stopped hoping for decent RPGs and turned to an unlikely source…books.
These are actual bundles from Gamestop.
See the responses at IGN.