Can’t you tell?

“Pew pew pew.”

Check out the video game flower she made. It’s crazy to think that she will look back on the Kinect in the same way I look back on the NES.

5 For every boot of the tramping warrior in battle tumult
and every garment rolled in blood
will be burned as fuel for the fire.
6 For to us a child is born,
to us a son is given;

“For” is an important transition word, right?

May today and tomorrow be restful for you in light of a hard-fought peace that you did not earn.

I did get a haircut, which normally shouldn’t be too much news, but when it only happens, like, five times a year (I never did the math until now), inquiring minds want to know. I have lost my Alan Moore disguise. Mike, I’m excited to see Colorado’s Baron Davis Effect.

Nice.

I guess my version of Santa does look like Donkey Kong chucking down barrel-y goodness. It would make sense considering Yuffie the Snowman is trying to catch a ninjabread man scaling the roof of the A-frame.

You, reader, should sell these things to inform people about unit conversions.

I am thankful for surprise visitors, paper airplanes, and ma na ma na.

Unrelated: one SPAM attack this week tried to lure me in by saying that my site had an issue in Internet Explorer. Nice try, SPAM! Everyone has an issue in IE.

Here’s how we do it in our neighborhood. Years ago, we had a neighbor who, legend has it, allowed Halloween to throw up in her yard – inflatable pumpkins reaching towards the heavens. She would always sit out in her driveway and hang out with friends. We joined her in this tradition and continue it, even though she has since moved. (She did come back and visit tonight, which was really cool.)

Some strange guests did appear, like a Plant who looked more “in love with” a Zombie and not so much the “versus” aspect.

Yes, they have a pet cow. Because, frankly, why not?

Also filed under Why Not: a ghost on stilts.


Naturally, a sword fight ensued (not the first time at my house, by any stretch of the imagination) and we lost track of who was the ghost.


He’s actually a lot more dexterous than the photo gives him credit for, but it still makes me laugh.

We also maintained the tradition of having teens sing. One group said that they didn’t speak English, so naturally my wife called ‘em out in Spanish. How did it end? With them singing in Spanish, of course.

Side note: we have a garage mariachi band that practices each night in our neighborhood. You know how grunge bands whine and shred incomprehensibly when they first start out? Now picture that with a sad trumpet and an oom-pah tuba.

In yesterday’s post, I showed off our Phineas and Ferb pumpkin. What you didn’t see is the Extreme Effort (I took a Feat in it the last time I leveled up) it took to carve it since I hate getting my hands dirty:

Thanks to all who showed up and shared pizza with us. We should do it again.

This photo is a thing of beauty.

It feels good to be in Flag. And what do you do when you go to Flag? Make a Target run. This is the same place where my parents bought me my first tool set when I assembled the entertainment center for Tom’s and my room. This is where I bought the first Metal Gear Solid for Mike’s Playstation. I still remember Devin and I marvelling at the intro cinematic and how realistic the wavy water looked. That cut scene was a whole two minutes – now picture how many hours of Metal Gear footage there are.

Tonight’s run was for Alleve and pull-ups. The homecoming king and queen now have kids.

My laughing place is wherever Uncle [Slade] is soaked and yelling at animals.

She also just asked me if sasquatches (or “sadisquats”) are real and was very relieved that they aren’t.

OR ARE THEY?!?

My wife lined us up with a hotel right across the street from Disneyland, which was awesome. All we had to do each night was escape Main Street and the bleeping turnstiles (not an expletive – the turnstiles do bleep) and totally skip the Happiest Traffic Jam on Earth. I also know that I have what it takes to make the trek into Mordor. I was able to carry 30 pounds worth of lembas in my backpack while hefting an exhausted hobbit over my shoulder (substitute the One Ring for pink princess Minnie ears).

So, the moment Mike has been waiting for: the new Star Tours.

It was awesome.

Okay, moving on.

Just kidding. The ride was great, although not as random as I thought. The beginning and end set up a storyline that a Rebel spy has stowed away on the Starspeeder 1000. The middle is random. Driving to California, I told my wife that the one storyline that I didn’t want to see was our ship being involved in a podrace in the Boonta Eve Classic.

You guessed it. My first time riding Star Tours, our 40-passenger ship traded paint with Sebulba and his podracing rivals, throwing all sense of scale out the window. But our last night in Disneyland we rode it again and made our way to Kashyyyk where stormtroopers spiraled into trees and a Wookiee faceplanted onto our windshield in a vaguely Garfield-esque manner.

The way that the ride incorporates members of the audience into the story is great and I don’t want to ruin the surprise. The storyline is protecting a spy. It’s not blowing up the Death Star. Fans of the Rogue Squadron novels will like the “not everyone in the galaxy is a Jedi, folks” aspect. Waiting in line has been updated, too. The repair bay droids now scan luggage instead and have a cool thermal effect on a big screen TV that uses current video from the line. I also found out that the REX droid from the original ride must have had a jacked vocabulator, because the REX in the pre-boarding video sounds like a leading man from a 1930s space serial. Ralraa, you’re not alone in your Star Wars speech impediments. Most of the line was indoors and, at the very least, involved listening to Star Wars music while chatting with friends. Not a bad way to spend my time.

My oldest got to be a part of the Jedi Academy (thanks, in part, to Auntie Tina jumping up and down yelling, “Pick her! Pick her!”) and my wife was savvy enough to stick around after the Princess Faire to give my youngest a chance to hang out with Cinderella and Snow White.


It’s a weird thing to pray for as a dad, that your oldest would get chosen to go on stage and swing a flashlight around, but if you know my daughter’s heart, you’d understand. And check out my youngest’s face in the Cinderella photo. Yep, she’s excited.

Another really cool ride is the Toy Story Mania ride. Now, this may not be new to you, but it’s been almost a decade since my wife and I had been to Disneyland/California Adventure. I thought I got a pretty good score. My wife beat it by 30,000 points.

131,200 was the high score for everyone on the ride to see (my youngest got 18,700). I shall now sulk with Hamm the sarcastic bank.

My oldest and I do look pretty cool in 3D glasses, though.

World of Color
When I heard this “attraction” advertised to me, I pictured the old Sparklett’s water display that was a bunch of high-powered drinking fountains and some gel lights. World of Color sounded like something my grandma would enjoy, like how she always stopped for an hour to take pictures of the flowers at the Disneyland entrance.
I was pleasantly surprised with World of Color. It’s definitely something that you have to see at least once in your lifetime. Colors of the Wind was not predictably included in the soundtrack medley, which was pleasantly surprising.

We did get to meet a lot of characters. Any other place on Earth and they would just be twenty-somethings trying to pay off their student loans, but in Disneyland we ask for their autographs.

Sea World and the San Diego Zoo were perfectly timed in that the weather started getting warmer, so we were able to choose more of where to go without standing in line too much. Sea World and the San Diego Zoo also have different approaches to conservation. At Sea World, we were told multiple times that we (an inclusive “we” that clumps in whales, otters, sea gulls) are all part of the same family. The zoo told us that humans are the only species with the ability to enjoy and protect every other species on the planet. The zoo is definitely more my approach and didn’t leave me wondering why dolphins never attend our family reunions. [insert your own "So Long and Thanks for All the Fish" joke here]

Sea World and the San Diego Zoo are best recalled in photos, so here comes the blast (from Sea World, since the only picture from the zoo that you can’t see in Phoenix is yesterday’s panda):

I swear that beluga was smiling at me. I put my hand up to the glass and knew that he would swim to it. It was a weird connection.

I’m a storyline person, especially when it comes to rides. I tried really, really hard to follow the story on Sea World’s Atlantis ride. From what I can tell, Neptune is peeved that humans are polluting and he throws us around a lot. As we’re put in an aquarium and shot into the air, a humpback whale, an orca, and a blue whale realize that we have kindness in our hearts and break the glass in the aquarium in the sky and send us splashing to the ground.

That’s my best guess. I’m now going to Google it.

The ride cobbles together a disjointed “story” through several ride element “scenes.” Ride narrative played on speakers mounted throughout the ride provides prelude to the next ride element. While the audio was clear, the distraction of the ride and the music made it hard to understand everything that was said; nor could this reviewer find any cohesive story arc after several rides.

Yep. That about sums it up. At least with Splash Mountain I could figure out that Brer Fox was trying to catch Brer Rabbit – and that there’s bees!!! Tons of fun, though. If the desired outcome was wetness, that was accomplished. It made for a great night of showering up and having dinner in the hotel lobby, which is next to a beach and we didn’t have to drive anywhere.

We had a great time as a family, both immediate and extended. The Netflix Project helped. It also has me eyeing Disney Universe…

We’re in the hotel lobby in San Diego. My daughters think the lobby koi are huge. I can’t wait until they see today’s surprise.

And after that, we rode the Grizzly River ride. We were the last raft through. We also got very cold.

My youngest and I were surprised by a Tron rave. If it was my wife and I, we would have strapped on our identity discs and partied like it was End of Line.

My oldest, the best Chicken Little actress ever, also created this Grumpy Bird, which is in no way connected to Rovio or its intellectual property.

The trees have endurance, but they need serious help on their footwork.

Crazy faces

Her notes on the sermon are definitely more concise and to the point than my own this morning. So cool.

It’s Buena Vista and not RKO. It’s also based on a book, which I had forgotten.

This is the beginning of that rougher look of the 1960s cartoons, and here’s why: Xerox. In order to draw those complex scenes with all those dogs and all those dots, the animators Xeroxed much of the movie. That style and technique stuck until computers started being used. All of the vehicles are live action that have been traced.

On the topic of Xeroxing: Lady, Peg, that bulldog, and Jock all show up in one quick scene. At first I thought that it might be a cool “this story is happening at the same time as 101 Dalmatians“, but then the timelines don’t fit. A headline on a newspaper Roger is reading says “Carlsen speaks”, which is from an accident in 1952. Jim Dear and company are from the early 1900s.

Another interesting collision of worlds: Jasper and the Colonel come face to face at the end. What’s funny is that Pat O’Malley voiced both characters.

The DVD DOES have a Disney channel kid singing the Big Song. What’s funny is that, for a movie about a guy who writes music, there are only two songs in the film. One song is “Dalmatian Plantation” (and I won’t make any snarky comments about how long it took Roger to come up with that rhyme) and the other is “Cruella DeVil“:

Yep. Selena Gomez. Is it bad that I miss the Jonas Brothers?

What was my youngest’s favorite part? When the puppies hid their spots in the dirt.
My oldest’s favorite part? The bark network.
My wife’s? When Roger writes the Cruella song and then plays it sarcastically when she shows up. (That is pretty funny.)
Mine? I thought a story of a writer and a musician living together was rather delightful.

Well, as Netflix DVD Doomsday approaches, I’m glad that we went out swinging. For those that have known me for a long time, the following should catch your attention.

I think I’m actually a fan of Disney.

One factor heavily swaying my opinion is the prospect of taking my daughters to Disneyland. Another huge factor is that one of my old roommates now is one of their animators (woohoo, Tom! Try and work a Red Ox (or, even better, Mike’s EggMan) into the next movie).

I still think it’s shady that Walt Disney put the people organizing a Disney labor strike in front of the House Un-American Activities Committee. The watering down of stories also bugs me.

But as I create, I now understand why Disney protects their intellectual property so rigidly. Yes, there’s obvious moneymaking, but there’s also a desire for Walt’s artistic intentions to be preserved.

Today I came across this cartoon tribute from 1966 when Walt died of cancer:

You would think ten years of teaching would dull the appeal of whiteboards. Nope.

Well, you know what I mean.

(Yes, Mom, I’ll provide a link about what in the world I’m talking about.)

The songs do become the catchier jingle style that the 60s had for Disney. You can thank the Sherman brothers for that. They also worked on Jungle Book, Mary Poppins and Winnie the Pooh and the Honey Tree (“I’m just a little black rain cloud…”) They’re the 1960s version of Alan Menken.

BUT ALAN MENKEN DIDN’T WRITE “IT’S A SMALL WORLD”.

SURRENDER YOUR BRAIN TO THE SHERMAN BROTHERS.

They introduced leitmotifs into Disney movies. Every time Mary Poppins shows up, a strand of instrumental “Spoonful of Sugar” plays. In The Sword in the Stone, you hear traces of the packing song (“Higitus Figitus“) when Merlin’s doing his thing.

I still say Higitus Figitus sounds like “Everybody Wants to be a Cat” (check three minutes into the clip), but maybe that’s the John Williams syndrome. Every time I hear the Indiana Jones tank song, I hear the Separatist droid army song. At least it’s not as cookie cutter as Randy Newman (in this link he’s getting political and yet I can still sing “You’ve Got a Friend in Me”).

The DVD did not have a bonus feature of the Big Song. I can’t even name the Big Song, but my wife would like to see Ashley Tisdale try and sing “Mad Madam Mim“.

My oldest’s favorite part? The flirting squirrels.
My youngest’s? When Mim turns into a dragon.
My wife? The wizard battle, which is funny because her second favorite part is the moral that magic won’t solve your problems.
Mine? That Merlin said the books always get packed first. Finally, someone who understands my packing strategy.

I have to comment on the animation style. Even though it’s more Jungle Book/Aristocats (rougher edges than the 1950s), the attention to detail is awesome. Even when Merlin is a fish or a squirrel, it still looks like Merlin. Every little misplaced hair, every ruffle of fur, is very impressive. Robin Hood, why can’t you be more like Sword in the Stone? That’s how you do mythological-Britons-who-may-or-may-not-have-been-real-people-but-history-still-obsesses-over.

Slade, you’ll be proud that my Call of Duty playstyle carries over into Battleship. And, just like on LIVE, I’m getting schooled by a little kid.

Peter Pan breaks from the mold by not having an actual book open nor do the singers croon about the name of the main character. This time they’re singing “We Can Fly”, which is pretty fun.

Also in the beginning is a screen thanking the copyright holders, the Great Ormond Street Hospital. How cool is that? Give your copyright, which is worth quite a bit, to an organization that helps children. I want to be able to do that someday.

Let’s take a moment to honor Bill Thompson. He is another voice actor, much like Phil Harris and Ed Wynn, that is very recognizable. If you liked Jock in Lady and the Tramp, the White Rabbit in Alice in Wonderland, Hubert in Sleeping Beauty (Hubert?), or Smee, you’ve enjoyed the work of Bill Thompson.

Droopy Dog is Bill Thompson, too.

Bobby Driscoll is The Pan (in my mind, Hook is still the original). He’s also Jim Hawkins in Treasure Island and, more importantly, Johnny. You know, Johnny, the kid from Song of the South.

I’m still wrapping my brain around the physics of Never Land, which might be a futile endeavor. How is Peter Pan able to hold his own versus a rapier using only a dagger? Does he have enhanced reflexes from being part pixie? Has he trained for a very long time as an immortal? Is he Legolas’s cousin?

Still no Disney channel star singing the big song. Is “We Can Fly” the big song? That song’s on many sing-alongs. You know which song is not as featured? This one:

“Good. This should be most enlightening.”
Yeah, I don’t think “enlightening” and “Why is the Red Man Red?” can be uttered in the same sentence. Actually, I think I just did.

I appreciate that the story’s about Wendy, really. Boy and girl relationships run throughout the story and complicate things. I was talking to my friend, Andrew, today about growing up. He was told that he needed to wear shoes now that he’s out of college. I have the opposite thing going on with my basketball shorts. Maybe it’s because we’re both from the same hippie college, but if changing our fashion is the requirement for growing up, then I pass.

What were my family’s favorite parts of the movie?

My youngest liked how the crocodile’s eyes bounced to the rhythm of the clock. My oldest liked that but also thought it was cool that Mr. Darling recognized the pirate ship from a distant memory of youth (yeah, my daughter’s awesome).

My wife is more a fan of the slapstick. Every time Hook was dancing with the crocodile (“dancing with the crocodile” being a euphemism for “on the verge of being eaten by a mankiller”), she was cracking up.

I’m no better, though. My favorite part was the pirate singing and playing the concertina only to be shot nonchalantly by Captain Hook.

We all know their grace and beauty come from my side of the family. Let’s just ignore Slade’s “desert yeti” nickname for me.

I will quote this comment from Martin Gardner:

As a check against the tendency to find too much intended symbolism in the Alice books, it is well to remember that when Carroll gave the manuscript of this poem to Tenniel for illustrating he offered the artist a choice of drawing a Carpenter,a Butterfly or a Baronet. Each word fit the rhyme scheme and Carroll had no preference as far as the nonsense was concerned. Tenniel chose the carpenter.

I will give my two wacked-out cents/sense (see? I can wordplay, too!) about the art. My oldest and I appreciated that the English countryside is very detailed, down to the blades of grass, so that Wonderland has a stark contrast of screensaver-ish proportions. (She noticed the details. I don’t think she knows what a screensaver is (flying toasters had lyrics?).)

I classify Disney songs in one of two categories: radio friendly and not. “A Whole New World“? Radio friendly. “The Morning Report“? Not. (Pull up to a stop light blasting that. You’ll see what I mean.)

Alice in Wonderland‘s title song sounds a lot like Cinderella’s, which makes sense since Cinderella is 1950 and Alice in Wonderland is 1951. Have you ever sat through the opening credits of these movies?

“Cinderella/She’s as lovely as a breeze”

or however that song goes.

Alice in Wonderland is the same.

“Alice/in Wonderland”

but what makes it more awkward is that they try and rhyme everything with Wonderland…underland…blunderland.

I have also determined that any song Alice sings is not going to see any airtime outside of the movie. Did you know that she sang? Me neither.

Disney songs also have a tendency to narrate character actions. Guess what the cards are doing during “Painting the Roses Red”. I’ll give you a hint: it isn’t doing their taxes. To be fair, most musicals and even Mozart’s operas narrated actions to death…literally.

Alice also is guilty of major foreshadowing. “If I ever have my own land, it will not make sense. It will be a wonderland.” My favorite line of hers is, “This is the stupidest tea party ever.” I thought that was gutsy for 1951.

Disney first started working on the film in 1933, so you can see it took the studio a while. They said it was tough capturing the episodic style of each section of the books into one coherent movie. I can see that.

There is no Disney channel heart throb singing “Very Merry Unbirthday”, which made me kinda sad, but there was a deleted scene of the Duchess and the Psycho Baby. The artwork matched the first edition of the book, with the insanely disproportioned heads. So scary.

The Cheshire cat in the theatrical release sings part of “Jabberwocky”. That decision cut his original song, “I’m Odd”, out of the picture. BUT THANKS TO THE HEROIC EFFORTS OF THE VAULT DWELLER (is this Disney or Fallout?), the sheet music was discovered. Enjoy it in all its Haunted Mansion-esque glory.

My oldest’s favorite part of the movie? The Mad Tea Party (hold your Bachmann jokes, please) song. My wife loves the visual gags connected to the wordplay, like the actual half a cup of tea.

My youngest? The “cat who smiles in the moon”. I had to ask her to limit her answer. Initially she said she liked Mickey swing dancing with the queen, which is a part of an old cartoon included on the DVD.

My favorite part? When the cards number off and 1-10 and then there’s a random yell of, “Jack!” I also find it funny that the guy who voiced the King of Hearts is named Dink (you know, because the king is bossed around and everything). I also recognized Pat O’Malley (from Jungle Book), James Macdonald (every Disney mouse other than Mickey), and Don Barclay (the Guy Who Gets Kicked Around in Every Movie).

But who could miss Ed Wynn? That guy’s voice is so cool. Only one guy could play Dr. Dussel, Uncle Albert, and the Mad Hatter.

And then I get to come home to a wonderful family full of artists:

This is my youngest’s depiction of a flower. So cool.

They followed up Snow White with Pinocchio. They enlisted the talent of Mel Blanc (the voice of the donkeys) and the ukulele-wielding Cliff Edwards (as the singing cricket).

The storybook opening is the same as the others. What’s cool is one of the storybooks is Alice in Wonderland, which wouldn’t come out for another decade. Disney prioritized Three Caballeros. How do you win a war? With singing birds. And guns.

The animation is beautiful. The only parts that date it are the schools of fish and the Blue Fairy’s face. Her very diminished facial features are similar to Snow White’s. One of the really cool parts, though, is that the animators drew the Blue Fairy without the telltale black outline that the other characters have.

Geppetto is so steampunk. His tinkering with gears and THE BLUNDERBUSS HE KEEPS UNDER HIS PILLOW give it away. I also love his clocks that depict various stages of animal death.

My wife’s favorite part? Any time Jiminy Cricket sings. A close second are the clocks.

My oldest’s? The tiny fish that follows Jiminy when he’s underwater. My youngest’s? Cleo the goldfish dancing with Figaro the kitten.

My favorite part? The existential analysis of what it means to be human.

Yeah, you heard me.

Jiminy is not sure about a puppet gaining life. “A lovely thought, but not at all practical.” Yep. Life is not practical. God could have very well existed on his own but created some very impractical works of art. Jiminy describes himself as “the still, small voice that no one listens to” with the purpose of guiding people “along the straight and narrow path”.

Jiminy is definitely not deity, though, unless you count some very Zeus-ish tendencies. Every single chance he gets, he tries to hook up with a girl. If he hadn’t been trying to get with a clock, he might have noticed the boy made of wood sticking his finger in a fire. Can a conscience have a conscience? Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?

The DVD started out with an anti-smoking ad. Watch the movie. Count how many times Pinocchio, a donkey-boy, a fish, a cricket, or a whale inhale tobacco. Heck, they even have Tobacco Row on Pleasure Island.

Like with all the special editions, the Big Song is sung by a Disney channel puppet.

This time, the Big Song is THE BIG SONG. You know, the one they play every time the Disney logo shows up? The one they’ve played for decades?

They had Meaghan Jette Martin sing it. The autotune fits the whole automaton theme.

Watching this video made me wonder if Robin Hood had a music video. Do I want to wait another Netflix DVD cycle to find out? No.

Aaaaand…

It’s boring.

Tonight, like many nights, I helped my daughter with reviewing her spelling and vocab words. This time, I made her recite them out loud. I told her that I was seeing if she could be a part of the X-Men or not.

That prompted my youngest and I to start singing this song:

Man, if you can spell while we do that, you can spell during class.

That is more this style of coaching:

Watching X-Men has now made me nostalgic for these shows.

Just like how Jungle Book looked like it was from the 60′s, this one is definitely the 30′s. Snow White looks like a 30′s Hollywood star and some of the animals looked Betty Boop-ish.

It’s a classic tale of obsession with beauty that leads you to hire a guy to cut out your stepdaughter’s heart and bring back the evidence in a conveniently-decorated box.

There’s an interesting blend of stop animation water in the wishing well (and the obvious storybook opening and closing).

The Big Song is covered on this DVD by Tiffany Thornton. (who?)

My oldest’s favorite part? When Dopey stood on Sneezy’s shoulders and danced with Snow White a la Sleeping Beauty.

An aside: Snow White sleeps more than Sleeping Beauty. She’s discovered in the dwarves’ house sleeping, much like Goldilocks, and then is encased in the glass coffin for her Sleeping Death. (The ornery dad part of me told the girls that when the dwarves killed the queen, that was the end of the movie. Roll credits. They were not happy with that ending. It helped that the movie faded out and defaulted to text to catch up the narrative.)

My youngest’s favorite part? The queen turning into a bad girl, with the spiky hands.

My wife’s? The pipe organ silly song:

Proof that my wife and I are meant for each other? Just like with Jungle Book, she stole my favorite part. You gotta love this song. It bring backs so many memories of walking around Disneyland. Add that to the Hobbit-esque dwarf hoedown, and it’s instant win.

So, I have to pick a new favorite part. I guess I’ll choose when the dwarves return from their Heigh Ho mine to see the lights on. Grumpy warns everyone to approach with caution. Listen to the guy. In a world where apples can kill you and princes feel free to hop over walls to stalk you at your only water source, some caution may be prudent.

I do love that the haunted forest is not really haunted but is really a fear-induced jazz daze montage. I also appreciate (in a “Wow. This is the 30′s and not the 50′s” sense) the vultures sweeping down to snack on the queen. Very grim, like the hunter getting tangled up in the vines at the end of Tarzan. Snow White does actually do more things than Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty. I’m definitely more of a Mulan and Rapunzel fan.

Call down an avalanche using a rocket? Yes, please.

She was very excited when her big sister walked through the door this afternoon.

My oldest told a story about a giant apple that had seagulls tethered to its stem. (She’s reading James and the Giant Peach for school. (Summer reading in elementary school?))

My wife said that once we finish the Narnia book we’re reading as a family, the first Narnia movie will be unlocked. (I think she’s been playing too much LEGO Star Wars.)

I’d try and pass for normal, but you’re reading the bloggh, so you know better.

Yes, I saw everything from the 80′s on, but some of the older ones I only saw once or twice and don’t remember that well. I know that I saw the 50th anniversary for Snow White in the theater because I won a coloring contest. All I remember was some dwarves running up a mountain and lightning.

As a family, we’ve decided to use the now annoyingly-priced DVD portion of Netflix to watch all of the Disney movies I don’t remember.

We started off the new bloggh series with The Jungle Book.

This one is representative of the 1960′s Disney movies (101 Dalmations, 1961; Sword in the Stone, 1963; Jungle Book, 1967). You can tell it has the 60′s influence by the shading of the cells and how the character designs have more stray lines. It’s also the 60′s because you have the vulture Fab Four.

It’s funny how distinct some of the voice actors are. You can hear characters from other Disney movies in the voices. Sterling Halloway played Kaa and Winnie the Pooh, as well as the Cheshire Cat and that Bob Newhart-ish mouse from The Aristocats. Phil Harris is Baloo and O’Malley from The Aristocats.

And then you have Clint Howard:

Baby Elephant, Roo

He’s been in 203 films. Most people know him as That Guy.

So, with each venture into Disney history, we’ll give you our family reactions.

My youngest’s favorite part? When the tiger claws the snake.
My oldest’s? When the snake falls and breaks his back.

I asked them separately, so this is proof that kids, in general, are inherently violent.

My wife’s favorite part? King Louie and the monkeys.
I agree with her. That’s my favorite part, too. “I Wanna Be Like You” is just so catchy.

King Louis Prima
Ooo bee doo

With every re-release of Disney movies “out of the vault” (imagine being that security guard. “I am willing to take a bullet for you, Song of the South. There is no way anyone’s taking you out of the vault. Over my zipadee-doo-dah dead body.”), the DVD has a music video of some Disney channel golem performing The Big Song.

And here, to ruin it all, are the Jonas Brothers:

If I had to pick a new favorite since my wife chose mine, I’d choose that stupid look Mowgli gives when The Girl (Check the cast. That’s her name.) goes all weird eyes on him.

To finish, let’s pause for a moment of silence for Ricky the Rhino, the dumb, blind animal that never made it past the storyboard:

“Hyuk. Hyuk. I will have my revenge.”

I think my daughter may be tall. The cute hippie foot is my wife’s. The sparkly Converse shoe is my daughter’s.

The spies that broke into the base

The train we took to the museum

The buffalo hindquarters that advised us on safety protocol

The pseudo-science that assured us that if we, the bowling pins, would all unite, we could break the bowling ball

The news studio at the museum

The reporters

The construction chief

Trying to build a structure to withstand an earthquake

Testing out an airplane in a wind tunnel

My wife’s dream house, inspired by Buckminster Fuller

My wife’s and my view this morning

What 9:30pm looks like in Utah – notice the blue sky
(Yes, J, we did see Super 8. It was a better choice than the Selena Gomez movie.)

My youngest as a horse cradling a chicken – why not?

We’re having fun. The high was 80 degrees today. Not that I noticed, though. I spent most of the day writing inside. I’m almost done with my short story about a librarian who fights off marauders using Henry V and the battle of Agincourt. This is what happens when you hang out with Mike for a whole weekend.

I was going to write up a Father’s Day post, but that would have cut into Sisko time. It was to be a grand celebration of fathers from entertainment, like Homer Simpson, Darth Vader, and That Guy Who Let His Kids Go Without Him to a Park Full of Cloned Dinosaurs.

Sisko is actually a cool dad, aside from the whole “raising a son in an intergalactic casino on the disputed borders of a provisional government”, but no one beats Atticus Finch.

My kids think I’m pretty cool, too, which is amazing. We do share some common fashion interests:

They also get me. Check out this awesome gift I got:

A full-on easel with six canvases. So cool.

Yep. Honey.

Every dad needs a Ninja Girl.

Don’t worry, I snickered accordingly.

But I shouldn’t be too smarmy. I was joking with my daughter about how scary it would be if a brachiosaurus was actually a carnivore and could whip that head around in a violent feeding frenzy.

Her answer? “Dad. Sauropods always eat vegetables.”

The homework is to Look and Say the math problem and then Write and Say the problem.

My oldest was frustrated that she couldn’t just say it in her head. I told her that it’s important to learn how to follow directions. She said it was boring. The ninja master side of me came out. I closed my eyes and listened for writing. If I heard a pencil scratch unaccompanied by voice, I struck.

Math homework was less boring tonight.

(We’re now dividing paper money based on how many new and/or used games we could buy.)

Thanks for the gift card!

Just had to say it.

Thanks, nephew, for the poem. Here is the world debut of Moon:

Moon

Oh, beautiful moon
You have a lot of craters
You light up the night

I started drawing with my youngest tonight and illustrated my favorite character (who’s only in the book for five pages, max.) My youngest drew her own character.

I finally got around to clearing off some 3.5″ disks at school (where better to find a floppy drive in 2011 than a school?) I really don’t know why I felt like I needed to keep around those disks. 1.44MB doesn’t buy you much these days.

I am really glad I did, though. Check out why I found:

But that file sat alongside this file:

Captionary and Ohm started their married lives on Saturday. What will they be like 50 years from now?

My wife and I saw a movie yesterday – in the theater. I can’t remember the last time she and I saw a movie alone. The last movie I saw in the theater (correct me if I’m wrong (like online commenters need to be told that twice)) was Inception, but my wife and I went with the church staff to see that. It’s been at least a few years since we’ve been alone in a theater. //checking bloggh archives…// Confessions of a Shop-Aholic.

The movie that we saw (don’t want to name it or else it would be Spoiler City (that’s not the name of the movie)) got me thinking about two birthday-appropriate things:

1) What would I do if I knew I only had a minute left to live?
2) Who would I want to spend my last moment with?

I can tell you that the answer to #2 is my wife and daughters, although you rarely get to choose when you die. It’s because of that uncertainty that I don’t have a definitive answer to #1. I’m sure if I thought about it, I would do something with donuts and sharks, but that sounds more like the cause of #1 and not the effect.

With those two questions in mind, I got to thinking about my grandparents and my wife’s and the positive examples they gave. I think people would be less tempted to be jerks to the people they love if they knew they only had a minute left.

Old people that have a sense of the immediacy, the fleetfulness, of life are cool.











I hope my kids see that in me.

This one got jealous of the pink bear and stole its Sith armor. I blame Bane’s Rule of Two.

Sometimes I wonder if working with junior highers for 8+ hours each day has stunted my aging process. My wife asked for help creating gift bags for my oldest’s birthday party tomorrow.

This is the result:

Today a student needed to borrow a yard stick twice, once to retrieve a pencil that had fallen behind a desk and another to retrieve a paper.

In the same class a kid borrowed a ruler, apparently to scratch his head. No offense when I Lysol the ruler afterward. I would do it for anyone.

That got me thinking: how many people use a yard stick for its intended purpose?

Pop Quiz time (Facebook, click here)!

And, to satisfy the grandparents…photos!

While I was cleaning up, I noticed things were a little too quiet with my kids. When I checked on them, I found my oldest cleaning her room and my youngest ice skating on Clorox wipes in the bathtub.

Me: What are you doing?
Youngest: Cleaning.
Me: Oh. Carry on.

Saturday night we watched Despicable Me (great movie). Sunday we played basketball.

NBA Jam Guy: The toddler from long range!

My children’s Sunday School teachers rock. I should tell the director of Children’s Ministries. Yes, there is the occasional felt board, but on Sunday I walked in to find them at the end of an inductive Bible study:

There’s an intersection in Seattle that colloquially is known as my intersection (no Sasquatch jokes, please). I always appreciate easily accessible devices:

My wife also appreciated this guy who looks like George Carlin playing piano:

Anyone who is currently employed as an educator has probably heard of the FISH! Philosophy during a staff development training. My wife went to the fish market where that originated (although she didn’t have anyone sign the professional development triplicate, so I don’t know if it will count as recertification hours).

My daughter brought me a heart-shaped donut. I gave her a C-3PO SillyBand. Because we’re awesome.

I’m almost ashamed as to why I didn’t put up photos on Sunday night.

I had to watch the very last Hannah Montana episode as it aired on the Disney channel in the hotel. Miley had to choose whether to go to Stanford with Lily or go to Paris with Spielberg. I know, we all are faced with similar choices and, as such, the teen narrative was gripping and I fell asleep without posting photos.

[/end embarrassing apology]

This year’s build was one of our favorites, in part because of the kids we were building for.

My daughter is quite the ambassador. She gets along with every kid she meets.

This year was a year of learning new skills. My wife and her crew did the texturing for the concrete slab.

This year, Casas started bringing in cement from a local (Juarez) business owner instead of having the team mix it from scratch. Usually I wheelbarrow the entire foundation. I felt like a total slacker, like I had no identity, until it was time to drill holes. I even tried to pass off the job to a new person, but drilling is my destiny.

(You gotta admit – that’s a pretty epic photo.)

The house was finished the fastest I can remember

and the family was very thankful:

My wife won Memory, my oldest won second place, and I tied with the family member who wears diapers.

Keep them outta yer brain.

That made me feel pretty cool.

My wife later in the day had me pick the oranges off our tree (yes, it’s a tree and not a slightly zealous shrubbery).

My youngest and a Wookiee chieftain for size comparison.

My wife’s reaction?
“The fruits of Kashyyyk are like that of the Promised Land!”

Yeah. Just take a moment and bask in the many layers of why she’s perfect for me.

(Also of note: last year it was right around this time that we picked THE orange.)

As I got the kids ready for bed, I wore a pair of pants on my head (does it surprise you? No. I didn’t think so.) and tried to do my best Gungan impersonation.

Instead, my youngest said, “Hey! You’re Ahsoka.”

And that’s when I realized:

1. All three girls made a geek reference yesterday.
2. Ahsoka does wear pants on her head:
   

Today I woke up remembering a dream from last night where I had to organize 80 (why not 100, I don’t know) Kindergarten through 3rd graders and I only had three helpers. The helpers weren’t really help (they all taught at the high school I long-term subbed at)(oh, and they only would sing the Yale fight song at the top of their lungs) and when we got to our destination, the auditorium, the show had started, we couldn’t see the stage (it was literally blocked by a section of seats), and I hadn’t had a chance to go to the bathroom.

It was then that I realized that the field trip for the elementary kids was to go see The Crucible.

Yeah. 2010 was weird. I still stand by my predictions from last year.

Here’s what it looked like from a Most Frequently Used Words on the Bloggh perspective (the larger the font, the more frequently used):

It doesn’t do justice to some of the big events:

but it does challenge me to use more words than “Check this out” or “just” or “get/got”, although this is my relax bloggh so you won’t “see” me writing:

I have obtained the next DVD from Netflix.

Words that are pretty funny for the bloggh: If you think that I talk about “Wars” a lot, remember that it’s usually connected to “Star”. Also notice that “Sarlacc” is the same size as “Netflix”.

The visualization was made on Wordle. Go SEE it here.

Thanks to Jeremy for installing it and for my nephew demanding that we have it. Our kids are Commune Couriers and this should help them in their deliveries.

Their analysis:

Mom and Dad, I know you’ll read this and take comfort that Baked Goods are on the horizon. Today, though, I am enjoying my first lesson of Food Chemistry (it’s me, after all) with my oldest. Thanks, Rachel, for the cookbook.

For more Boxing Day fun, check out some of my other posts.

This past week we escaped to a cabin at an undisclosed location (it’s somewhere between Williams and Flagstaff, but the only landmarks are pine trees, which are relatively common up north). Thanks again, Mike, for the help. (Again, that’s not sarcastic.)

You can tell that all four of the adults present make a living interacting with people. Any non-conversation time was spent engrossed in trying to crush green pigs with pieces of concrete.

It was very much like this:

Yes, Devin, I hope the Birds and the Pigs can call a Christmas truce like the British and Germans of World War I.

We did use our words (horrible segue) in a game of Scrabble. I started the game out with vim. Yeah, I led with a “v” and only had three letters that worked. Mike followed it up with “pie”, which is always good. That’s why we allowed for the use of fanbag:

It was a serene setting that in a few hours changed from a brisk wind to snow on the ground.

This picture is peaceful until you realize that my daughter clocked me with a snowball soon after:

Both enjoyed their first real experience in snow:

We went back to campus so that our kids could see where legend stemmed from reality and their parents were, in fact, real people.

A decade ago I didn’t think I’d be taking a picture of my daughter in front of the JFK-esque lumberjack:

They moved the statue, but they still didn’t give him proper attire. I can’t help but think the dude would be more comfortable if he just had a shirt on.

Many things on campus have changed. It was reminiscent of Frodo returning to the Shire to illustrate that you can never go home again. Home has changed, you have changed, and that’s the natural course of things. All of NAU’s renovations look great. The one that caught me most off-guard was this:

I used to be THE NAUCard guy. They even had my photo on the university’s website to advertise it. (I think they needed someone bearded to go with the lumberjack motif.)

When I worked the ID card office, it was a simple counter that I sat behind and people walked up, I made them laugh, and then snapped a photo. Now it’s a very professional office that looks more like a bank.

This is how I felt.

You could say this is a piece of our Shire:

Things have changed, but I retain my snow fashion sense:

What’s new is the addition of cleats. Someone gave them to me years back and I had no clue what to do with them. (You don’t wear them on a basketball court and the patrons have a tough time paying attention if you wear them in the library.) Now they’re my official snow shoes.

The last night/morning I awoke to a clacking sound outside our bedroom. I thought it was my youngest rummaging around when she should be in bed, so I started to get annoyed. When I inspected the noise, sans glasses, I saw this thing flailing around on the ground. With glasses, I saw a mouse with a leg caught in a mouse trap. The thing was running all over the kitchen and hallway, which is pretty impressive.

None of us really wanted to kill the thing, so one of us (we’ll leave you guessing) grabbed the fireplace tongs and flung the mouse outside. We gave it a chance to live, but the elements are extreme in the northern night and the mouse didn’t survive. Don’t tell Mrs. Frisby.

I will take this time to point out how many people live out in the cold and that sometimes your religion needs to reach beyond “God helping those who help themselves.”

Before I stay too serious, I want to show you the most dangerous cologne in the world:

And now to close with a photo blast:

…and they’re green.

My daughter and I beat the original Ninja Turtles arcade game today. Sure, the game was made when my brother was four, but it’s still totally radical.

Grandma Audrey’s memorial/celebration was convicting. A life lived for Jesus is a beautiful thing and I hope that legacy will continue with our generation.

Once again we had the guys of the family grab a shovel and fill in the dirt. Death is so not-talked-about in our culture, sometimes to what I feel is an unhealthy distance, that there was something very real, very tangible, very transitional about leveling off the final shovelfuls. Thankfully I know that something similar to Luke 24:5 is being enacted, so the shoveling is more for us.

My wife did a great job of making sure that my youngest’s birthday was not forgotten this weekend. She and a friend unfolded an entire Dora story arc for the toddlers and their amigos.

Dora and Boots

Let’s give the toddlers blunt weapons and promise candy:

The setting was farm-ish (if The Map, The Map, I’m the Friggin’ Map is to be trusted), so bring on the cute photos of kids holding baby chicks:

And then the still cute, if yet frightening, re-enactment of Act V of MacBeth:

Some loving, if yet crazy, members of Christ’s Body decided to show us love in a very appreciated way by cleaning our house while we were at the memorial. I’m still overwhelmed and learning how to accept grace. My youngest, though, has learned how to accept a Memory game. She says thanks!

In the midst of a birthday and a memorial, we had cousins over.


The Polly Pocket/Beast wedding was going well until Vader showed up. Thankfully Beast has a wookiee for a best man.

Yep. It was a good weekend.

My daughter wanted to host a tea party today. When your most popular kids cookbook in your household has the word ‘wookiee’ in the title, there are certain recipes to expect.

The TIE fighters have returned in bready goodness. That recipe is easy. Cut a hot dog in half. Put it on a wookiee/cookie sheet. Wrap biscuit dough around it.

Check back later in the week for our take on the Death Star popcorn balls, the peanut butter pie, and psycho candy bears.

(By the way: it’s “rooohu rrooao cworchowowa!“)

Fresh!

My youngest likes to solve problems through automatic weapons provided by Mike, the world’s nicest arms dealer. How should I repay the favor?

Semi-unrelated: We’ve been watching Ducktales on Netflix. It’s not quite how I remember it (thanks, Slade).

My oldest left me a note, though. “My dad is as cool as a break-dancing sun.” That’s the best way to be welcomed home.

I tossed around a few ideas of how to celebrate. I could pass on a funny link from J about classic movies being remade by Zac Effron, show you fan films of Star Wars and Firefly (thanks, Devin), or give a pop quiz about which Harrison Ford character would win in a street fight (oh, don’t fret. We’ll see how Rick Deckard does soon enough).

I even tried recording a video blog (remember when people tried to call them vlogs? I’m so glad we put a stop to that. Now if we could just remove the word ‘tweet’ from the Internet, it would be so double rainbow.). The video web log started out okay until I realized I have a beard made for radio.

Then I tucked my oldest in and reflected about the past five years (cue ‘Sunrise, Sunset’). When I first started posting stuff online, it was to get extra practice for Masters degree homework. I still remember feeding her in her high chair while I coded HTML, wrote an essay, and had A New Hope playing in a window for her.

Tonight she told me that if she got scared, she would read a book on courage by Frank Peretti and that she would read a book on helping others in the morning so that she would start the day out right and build up the Body of Christ. She reads her sister’s Bible to her because “it’s the only important thing.”

So, with that, I say thank you for reading the bloggh for five years and one day I hope to be as cool as my daughters.

No words to express, I guess.

An added section of the story from our visit to the zoo: when my youngest saw the raccoon reaching his hand through the fence

she yelled out, “Swiper! No swiping! Oh, man!!”

I can see it.

Instead of the $15 to get in that we’re used to, the Willow Park Zoo has a little canister that asks for $1 donations on an honor system. Granted, they’ve got animals that are relatively easy to feed. The biggest cat is a bobcat, so no need for giant chunks of meat, and coyotes will eat anything.

Begin the random photo stream:





The eagles were injured in the wild, losing the ability to fly away.

We had to rearrange the carpool. There were some complications:

The fireworks were Friday night. Cruise-In was Saturday night. Today is the 4th of July. I think a picnic may be in order. To satisfy your curiosity until then, here are the photos from The World’s Largest Car Parade in Utah.

To set the mood, you could listen to “Ain’t that America/Little Pink Houses“. That’s the song that played through my head the whole time.

If that doesn’t work, you could watch Alex Wong’s amazing dance number from SYTYCD.

Little known fact: the Declaration of Independence was also signed by a guy in a gorilla suit:

Photos taken from the Walgreens parking lot. Be about it!

Yes, you did see a Tonka truck. There was also a Delorean – if you remember another 4th of July parade we saw, it makes sense. Can’t have Independence Day without time travel.
I guess Logan used to have a Delorean parts factory.

This video of the Cruise-in parade should bring you right into the thick of the action:

I didn’t get a photo of the motorcycle gang that carried a giant Confederate flag. I think they wanted their militia bear (complete with a Civil War hat and rifle) to be cute, but I was a little disturbed.

I’ve noticed there are some mergings between church and state here:

My daughter was wondering what people were pointing at:

By the looks of their faces, my guess is bear:

And this random photo is for Devin:

Is this the place?

We made the Logan Run in 14 hours. We’re going to go watch the fireworks right now. Tomorrow is the car show and Sunday is Sunday, so the 4th of July got bumped to tonight…at 10pm.

“Voosh! I have a lightsaber! Give me my money!”

That quote’s from my youngest. Having gone through the car accident and the dog bite, she has realized the harsh reality of the world.

Before she sunk too far into her jaded toddler self, she was able to play the spoons and have a jig party to Irish folk songs (“Rocky Road to Dublin”, a family favorite) with a cousin and everything was better.

Here’s the video for you Facebook people for when Facebook decides to import this post a week later.

Click on the thumbnail to see the full picture.

Mine – Double Cheeseburger Amana Robot

My oldest – FoodMaker Robot

My youngest – “Ha Ha! Robot!”

The unbroken crayon selection is quite girly in our house. I need to get my own set or Darth Vader will be sporting hot pink Sith alchemy.

Children contrast with the rich young man simply because there is no question of their having been able to merit anything. Jesus’ point is: there is nothing that any of us can do to inherit the Kingdom. We must simply receive it like little children. And little children haven’t done anything. The New Testament world was not sentimental about children and had no illusion about any pretended innate goodness in them. Jesus is not suggesting that heaven is a huge playground for Cajun infants. Children are our model because they have no claim on heaven. If they are close to God, it is because they are incompetent, not because they are innocent. If they receive anything, it can only be as a gift.

Our youngest ragamuffin got her first haircut last night. She had not cut her own hair yet, like her older sister had by this time, but I’m sure there’s some kind of grace imagery comparing a haircut freely given and the mangled mess that happens when kids try a self-trim with safety scissors.

Some things will go by too quickly, though. Right now my youngest sings the Imperial March much like her older sister used to. She then says, “Star Wars! C’est booyah!” I know this phase/speech pattern won’t last forever.

Yesterday I watched Return of the Jedi with her. I guess it had been a while. She didn’t remember any of it.

“No! That monster can’t eat Luke! What’s going to happen?”
“Just keep watching.”
“Whoa! He blocked his mouth with a bone!”

She knows the saga pretty well in the bigger picture, though.

Obi-Wan: The Force runs strong in your family.
My daughter: Oh. Leia?
Luke: What?
My daughter: What’s Luke’s problem? Can’t he tell Obi-Wan’s talking about Leia?

Apparently it’s been a while since we’ve watched a lot of the classics. My wife and I watched the Karate Kid yesterday. (And yes, I’m excited about the new one.)

The Karate Kid that we know is the channel 45 one, the version that we always catch from the tournament on. Did you know there’s more to the story than You’re the Best? There’s three different dates that Daniel and Ali (she has a name?) go on. All three are incredibly awkward.

I knew that Miyagi’s wife and kid died, but did you know it was at Manzanar? And Miyagi’s teaching style is awesome. His reflections on why we learn are refreshing. And, frankly, I think I’m going to order bonsai tree seeds for my circulation desk.

Me: Picture your research paper. Nothing else. Your thesis needs balance. [snip a branch] Now go paint the fence.

On the topic of epic mentors, a very influential one from my life hung out at our house today. Six years has been too long, friend.

I’ve learned some lessons, some that I can share here, others that you’ll need to talk to me in person about. What was really interesting/comforting is that Saturday morning I was helping J write a script for a video about Easter – along the lines of “Jesus Lives – So What?” (J is better about wording things so they don’t sound sacrilegious).

Saturday morning I was looking at 1 Corinthians 15, specifically:

For if the dead are not raised, not even Christ has been raised. And if Christ has not been raised, your faith is futile and you are still in your sins. Then those also who have fallen asleep in Christ have perished. If in Christ we have hope in this life only, we are of all people most to be pitied. But in fact Christ has been raised from the dead, the firstfruits of those who have fallen asleep.

I finished typing up my thoughts, e-mailed them to J, and then got my dad’s call to put on my shoes and race to the west side of town.

My grandma lived a life of serving others but it was not for this life that she was investing. All of the teaching, listening, baking, flower arranging, and generally being a good friend was because she cared for people, cared for the people in God’s church. Not that those acts earned her way into Heaven but that those signs of love are evidence of a faith lived out.

The end of 1 Corinthians 15 is the best, mixing in ideas from Hosea, Isaiah, and Revelation:

Death is swallowed up in victory.
O death, where is your victory?
O death, where is your sting?

One thing that broke me down, though, was an unopened card I had delivered on my first visit to the hospital. My grandma never recovered enough to be able to read it. I’m keeping the envelope in my car to remind me to seize the opportunities I’m presented with.

On that train of thought, this past Friday I started the first of many Dad-Daughter Days:

Yep. Pink Bear. Darth Vader Armor. It came with a plush lightsaber, too. I am proud.

And to the wonderful ballet teachers, thank you for your time and know-how. Also, thanks for something fun my family could go to:

Other odd highlights from today:
Two unrelated people spoke the same line from my life’s script. “You’re a librarian? That works. You can reach the highest shelf.” The first person had initially said that I was too tall to be a librarian until the shelf epiphany hit. The latter person (I’m the ladder person, I guess) was at the Apple store.

“You need a new power cord for your MacBook? Let me get the…nevermind.” I pulled the box down. I had to stand a little on my tiptoes – a truly tall display.

Did you see talkinturkey’s exciting MacBook news? Very exciting, to say the least. I should have had the Apple Geniuses/Geniusi etch a giant lumberjack on my MacBook.

And Mike, you will be proud. A conversation teaching my youngest to use the word “rear end” instead of what she was saying devolved into the four of us singing Mr. Roboto in the kitchen.

The fact that Space Buddies was playing in the background was not a help. You should know that we have sneezed so much that my youngest is currently fake sneezing, saying, “Achoo! Oh, bless you!” over and over again in a sing-song voice.

I went on Microsoft’s Social Problem website to find a fix to my Internet connection (I browsed using the MacBook – Internet to the home was just fine). The solutions ranged from “re-install Windows 7″ to “don’t let your computer go to sleep”.

Don’t let your computer go to sleep? Wasn’t that Nightmare on Elm Street?

I tried one option that involved ipconfig and the typing of subnet masks. When that didn’t work, I tried the whole “unplug the router, modem, and computer then watch Budderball pass gas in his space suit then reconnect everything” option.

That one always works.

And Windows 7 Help Desk people – when my Internet is down, please don’t offer “have someone remotely connect to your computer” as the only Troubleshooting Wizard solution.

But kudos on Office 2010. I’m digging Word and Excel. PowerPoint, why can’t you be more like Keynote? [PowerPoint hangs its head and shuffles away.]

Internet’s up, I’m typing away, and now I will collapse on the couch.

Here’s a paradox, though: Why do I freak out? I broke no laws today. I am a U.S. citizen.

And yet when I saw the dog sniffing the car in front of us (the SUV that cut in front of 10+ cars just to squeeze into our van caravan) I got nervous. I had been reading the inspirational music on the different pages of my passport, words about liberty for the entire human race and forming a more perfect union, and it made me sad.

Why can’t people be cool to each other? The people that we worked with in Juarez today were.

The family is super nice. It’s a grandma, her daughter, and the kids. Alberto, roughly the same age as my oldest, thought I was crazy when I told him that we were almost done building my leg.

Piedra means leg. Pared means wall. Simple mistake, but you should have seen the looks on the kids’ faces.

Mike – With the Cardinals losing today, if your character goes to the Dark Side tonight, it would be understandable. Yes, I know he’s not Force-sensitive, but I’m sure you’ll find a way.

Devin, Jesse, Steve, and Gary – I’ll pass on a word of advice about Sith temples: Don’t drink the water. Sith temple being a euphemism for the U.S. Border Patrol station.

I will uphold my photo quota when I can steal…ahem…borrow some photos from friends. When I wasn’t wheelbarrowing concrete I was negotiating prices for botellas de Fresca, so I didn’t have much chance to snap any shots.

I can, however, steal this photo from the Concrete Pathways:

Thanks for helping me appease the grandparents.

My youngest was excited to go to Zoolights last Sunday.



My oldest took this photo of my wife and I.

Cabby hat? Toby Mac

Today also marks a momentous circumstance that had a bit of pomp.

We picked THE orange from the tree.

Not AN orange, THE orange.
A bird squawking out front alerted the armed guards.

Having forced the avian menace into retreat, an apprentice and I honed our shinai skills.


I swear that’s watercolors and not Celtic war paint.




The kids asked for more. I told them to wait another six years.