Booyor’s BLOGgh!

Less Papageno, more eating quail. I walk the dangerous border of breaking Man Law by posting photos from a bachelor party. This is the risk I take for you, reader. (Grandparents, stay tuned. Cute photos to follow.)(Peter, Laurel, and The Master Predictor: check for the picture of the country club version of the greengrocer’s apostrophe.)

Have you ever been to Bill Johnson’s Big Apple?

It stands out as being garish on Van Buren, which is saying quite a bit. But the serving staff is great. Our waitress was Ronda. I had to do my best to not bust out as Brian Williams.

On the topic of busting out: I’m glad to see Bill dressed up for the bachelor party.

They decorate in sawdust, so you know the meat is good. The quality of the establishment is proportional to the surface area of sawdust multiplied by the number of animals on the roof.

Endless Ribs, Endless Ribs…who ordered the jalapeno poppers? Jeremy, the bachelor party tradition lives on. (And yes, that was darn good salmon. I stick to my principles.)

I was a little wary when I saw that they import cattle from Crete:

I love the look on the guy’s face in the bottom-left corner.

As anyone who survived World War Z or is a fan of Simon Pegg knows, in any restaraunt/pub you must locate a defense against the undead:

Thanks, Mike. If zombies attack, I know I can trust you. Unless you become Zombie Mike.

Next was LazerQuest. It should be noted that in a world of “Phyborg” and “Grand Moff Crotch” (as Andrew told the embarrassed girl who had to call out score cards at the end, “It’s my last name. Please don’t laugh.”), class was immediately added to the fray.

A. Hamilton and A. Burr. Guess who was the Federalist and who was the assassin?

Those high school kids didn’t know what hit them while the Father of Banking sniped them from his perch across the arena. Other names worth mentioning: you know it’s a group of brothers when you get names like “Tax Collector” and “The Preacher”. The irony? The Preacher officiated the wedding. (Devin, I was tempted to enter “Shepherd Book” as my name.)

At the wedding they had a Point and Shoot camera set up next to the guestbook. A fun addition was props:

My grandma’s cousin’s neighbor’s niece from The Motherland was in attendance:

Lovely crowd reaction

No matter how fancy the place, proper punctuation is prime.


Posted five feet from each other
I don’t know which will hurt The Futile Ohm more, a punctuation error or a lack of uniform typography. And that photo outside of the Women’s Locker Room (not the Locker’s Room)? Imagine what I would have to say to explain why a big, hairy man is taking photos outside of the door. Thankfully I rolled a 20 on my Stealth vs. Non-bathrooms check.

And now the random photo stream:

New category!

Usually I get a breakfast burrito, a strawberry milk, and a water bottle. Instead, here’s what they gave me (minus the book):

Yes. Whole grain. Meh, it’s free.

Later, I painted over a giant chip in my library:

See if you can find it.

Have you ever noticed that on a Rockstar energy drink it says “Supplement Facts” instead of “Nutritional”?

If you haven’t had the Fiery Jalepeno Popper Chicken Sandwich from TGIFriday’s, you must.
Better than what greeted me when I tried to listen to Pandora:

When I was listening to my Will Smith station, “Summertime” came on. Immediately my wife’s ringtone chimed. Yep, “Summertime”. Very Fresh.

In other references to distorted reality, check out the speaking tour.

I just got an e-mail from a friend with this video. Thought I’d share:

“Search your peelings…”

Yes, the fact that I am writing a post is a momentous occasion. It’s so shocking, in fact, that just talking to Booyor about it made him literally run into a wall.

So, I had such an insane day yesterday, we thought it worthy of a blog post. As a point of reference, I stay at home with our two daughters (4 and almost-5-months). Some days we all get up early (6:30am) to take Dad to work. Here is a run-down of my Thursday:

6:00am: Both girls are awake. One is telling me it’s time to get dressed. The other is talking to herself in her crib. I should’ve realized it was going to be an off day…

7:00am: We drop Dad off at work. The 4 year-old asks me, “Mom, what does 3 plus 3 makes?” I show her how to count it on your fingers, and ask her to tell me. She answers, “Three.” Then she asks about 2 plus 2. She figures it out on her own this time. So, then I’m curious and I ask her about 2 plus 3. “Five” comes the answer from the back seat. More computation ensues as we drive down the freeways… Basically, as long as the numbers she’s adding are 5 or less, she’s adding perfectly.

7:30am-1:30pm: Lots of time spent in time out. Mostly, the 4 year-old… a couple of times: me.

8:30am: She asks me to get her scissors so she can cut some paper. I say no.

8:31am: She asks me to get her scissors so she can cut some paper. I say no.

8:32am: She asks me to get her scissors so she can cut some paper. I say no.

8:35am: She has gotten her step stool and has one knee on the stove. (The scissors are kept on the hood above the stove. They earned that spot after a self-inflicted hair style.) I say no, and send her to time-out.

8:40am: She asks me to get her scissors so she can cut some paper. I say no.

10:00am: The baby is asleep. The girl is playing by herself. I decide it’s time for a shower! While showering, the phone rings. I decide to let the answering machine get it.

10:20am: As I am drying off, my 4 year-old comes in and says, “Mom, the phone was ringing while you were in the shower. It was your friend.” I’m floored, “You answered the phone???? Who was it?” Girl: “I don’t know.” Me: “What did you say when you answered it? Girl: “Hello.” Me: “What did they say?” Girl: “Who is this?” Me: “And what did you say?” Girl: “The [last name].” Me: “What did they say?” Girl: “They’ll call you back.” I have decided it’s time to teach her how to answer the phone.

10:45am: “Mom, come see what I wrote on the computer.” Now, my daughter loves words, and she loves typing on the computer. Just last week, she showed me how she could open up Microsoft Word. When I cam out to look, the font was about 28-point and it was turquoise. Yep, she knows how to do that, too!

11:30am: I decide to clean off the table for lunch. Yep, I found the scissors and several pieces of cut paper on the table. At least my daughter owns up to her disobedience, but I still sent her to her room until lunch was ready… or so I had plan.

11:45am: I opened the fridge. I discovered the leftover bacon (uncooked, mind you) sitting on top of its ziploc bag on the floor of the fridge. I called the little girl from her bedroom, “Did you eat this bacon???!!?” “Yes.” I proceeded to tell her that it was not okay to eat bacon that hadn’t been cooked, that next time she wants a snack she should get some string cheese. Then I notice a folded up paper towel on one of the shelves. I opened it up to find a piece of bacon. I asked her if she had done this. She said, “Yes. I was full.” “How many pieces did you eat?” She thought about it… “Three.” MY CHILD ATE 3 PIECES OF UNCOOKED BACON!!!

12:00pm: I called my mom to find out if my child could DIE from eating uncooked bacon. Good news: she should be okay. I’m watching for parasite-like symptoms. Great.

Thankfully, aside from many more disobedient episodes, she was done with the experiments for the day. (Until she went to cooking lessons with Grandma… but that was supervised experimenting.)

Days like that are always good for a story. I’m very glad that they only come rarely. I fully expect her to grow about 3 inches next week, just to throw me for another loop. Finally, at the request of my Japanese poetry-loving husband, Booyor:

The Haiku
Phone calls and bacon
make for an interesting
day with my daughter

If you didn’t notice, my sister-in-law has a new feature on the site: Funky Foods.

Very fun. She is on a quest of procurement, much like a certain archaeologist, to acquire every taste. She’s gotta taste ‘em all! (Okay, so it’s much cooler than talking electric rats, I swear.)

Listen to what she says - the restaurants do. After her personal suggestion from previous weeks Nothing But Noodles has now fixed one of their recipes.

Oh, and she’s a bounty hunter. Just so you know. More Bossk than Dengar, even though she just passed her motorcycle test today.

I have begun a habit of harassing my “little” brother at work every Saturday night.  He works at Nothing but Noodles, a restaurant with a deceiving title since there ARE things besides noodles on their menu.

My goal is to attempt to try everything on their menu and review it for the brother.  This is my progress thus far:

Tonight:

• Thai Lettuce Wraps:  They were a little weird, but very flavorful.  The weird part was the chunks of jicama that were cooked with the chicken, but were still a little crunchy.
• New York Cheesecake:  This was VERY good, but was a little rich for it’s serving size… I almost felt sick by the time I finished it (even though my niece reduced the serving size by a bite).
• Buttery Noodles:  I just tasted my niece’s portion, but it was as expected… buttery and noodley.
• Spaghetti:  I tasted my nephew’s order of this, but unexpectedly (from the title of the dish) it was NOT long skinny noodles… it was the same curly noodles found in the buttery/noodley pasta.  The red sauce was good though.

Historical tastings:

• Cranberry Spinach Salad:  This was great!  Only compliments for this one… the poppy seed dressing wasn’t overbearing and the spinach tasted fresh!
• Beef Stroganoff:  This is good, but honestly, the best part was the breadstick (that comes with most dishes).  I LOVE their breadsticks… really they are addictive.
•  Pad Thai Noodles:  These are great!  I haven’t tried them with tofu yet, but I heard some other customers order it that way quite often.  They were flavorful and the noodle texture was perfect!
• Basil Pesto:  It didn’t come as the Farfalle pasta as stated in the menu.  I LOVE bow-tie pasta, so I was sorely disappointed.  I guess it tasted okay, but I can’t remember for being so distraught over the lack of favorite pasta.
• Cappelini Primavera:  a little bland… so it tasted as healthy as it was.  I liked it because I like veggies, but I think my type of consumer would be the only one who likes this particular dish.
• Three Cheese Macaroni:  I tasted my boyfriend’s order… the pasta was cooked to perfection and the cheese on top tasted great.  The “cheese” sauce underneath, however, left something to be desired… it didn’t taste cheesy at all… really just like a cream.  Bummer.  But this dish tastes great with beef in it!