The upcoming game L.A. Noire looks like a movie my dad would watch on a Saturday afternoon. This is the part where Slade and I would complain about Turner Classic Movies.

Now I think I’m intrigued…

(And did anyone see Greg Grunberg in the trailer? I’m guessing there’s no mind-reading detective.)

The Japanese palantir/satellite Hinode caught this great photo of the Eye of Sauron during a partial Sauron eclipse. Rumor has it, some otaku office worker is now able to stop time by grunting a lot.

And let’s not think Halo is an original idea.

1. All fires eventually die out; it’s just how much damage they do we try and prevent.
2. All cats eventually come down from trees.

You should see one of the .asf (who uses .asf?) movies I converted for a HazMat specialist today. A silo caught on fire and rocketed hundreds of feet in the air. At first I joined the students with, “Whoa! That was awesome!” and then realized: this is one of our student’s dads. Imagine if that’s your dad running into the giant explosion.

Timothy, you have my respect.

So when NBC debuts The Cape, about an angst-ridden ex-cop who turns to the superhero lifestyle, I will probably view it more like SuperBabies(and does NBC really need more angsty heroes? Because Sylar’s doing so well, I hear (only rumor, since I haven’t watched that whinefest for a season now)).

The trouble is I may not be able to tear myself away from the reference joke geek tractor beam that it is.

You may recall my obsession with Toto’s Africa after the Jeffster episode of Chuck. This has now been exploded by a combination of my friend Lauren and my Howard Shore/Vangelis Pandora station.

I present to you an a capella group singing Africa (mixed with an elementary school rain-finger-snaps-thing):

This video should tide you over until Glee this fall:

“Well you can tell by the way I use my walk…”

I read the rumor mill that Heroes has a new villain. A guy named Simon with a British accent. Really? Should we expect tight black T-shirts? He’s said to be very manipulative.

Accent + Manipulative = Linderman
Sorry, writers. You have exhausted your own trope.

Ah, yes.

No matter where you go, there you are.

These QR uber-barcodes are increasingly popular with mobile phone crowds, like in Switzerland, Japan, and Australia. Augmented Reality through QR Codes, I guess. You point your phone at the box, phone program converts the box, funny message (or usually advertisement) comes across. I tried running a couple of barcode programs on my phone, but they wanted me to have data access. I don’t have data on my phone; if you want to read what my shirt says, try putting the image URL into this site.

Chuck was awesome tonight. I loved the drive-in movie theater from Back to the Future III.

One thing about Heroes that my wife noticed that some might not – Baby Matt Parkman was facing his car seat backwards last time, now he’s facing forward. That’s a big change for a baby.

I worked on setting up barcode readers on my phone while I semi-watched Heroes. I think I still got the gist – this Sylar guy has issues and kills people.

Here are some quick photos from the birthday extravaganza:

I received two shirts. One is the QR code, the other shall make its world premiere on Saturday for La Noche de la Guerra de las Estrellas. World premiere? Cine Capri for the win. Gambit and Sabretooth will be hanging out in Scottsdale on the red carpet.

Some quick news blurbs:
Twitter now works for Charles Xavier’s Exceptionally Gifted students:

Seriously. Tweeting with your brain. That would be a first for Twitter, in all connotations.

3D camera for the semi-consumer market.

Have you seen the “similar images” search in Google? It looks useful if you want a different resolution of the same photo or if you want clip art that’s a little bit different from the previous images. It’s not like iPhoto’s new trick, where it can recognize facial colors and contours. Similar Images uses the metadata attached to image search results.

If you want Google image results to improve, you can check out the game that they set up so that you’ll whitewash their fences for them.

All of the Fallout fans with Blackberrys (berries?) can turn their phone into a working Pip Boy. Nuclear residue with style.

The gifts didn’t end with donuts and geek shirts. More photos to come throughout the week.

Here’s a shirt that made me laugh, even though I don’t have it. Wash would be proud:


And what post isn’t improved with a samurai?

My brain: Something something down in Africa…

Well, to help your brain and mine, here are the lyrics:

I hear the drums echoing tonight
But she hears only whispers of some quiet conversation
She’s coming in 12:30 flight
The moonlit wings reflect the stars that guide me towards salvation
I stopped an old man along the way
Hoping to find some long forgotten words or ancient melodies
He turned to me as if to say, Hurry boy, it’s waiting there for you
Chorus:
It’s gonna take a lot to drag me away from you
There’s nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do
I bless the rains down in Africa
Gonna take some time to do the things we never had
The wild dogs cry out in the night
As they grow restless longing for some solitary company
I know that I must do what’s right
Sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti
I seek to cure what’s deep inside, frightened of this thing that I’ve become
Chorus
(Instrumental break)
Hurry boy, she’s waiting there for you
It’s gonna take a lot to drag me away from you
There’s nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do
I bless the rains down in Africa, I bless the rains down in Africa
I bless the rains down in Africa, I bless the rains down in Africa
I bless the rains down in Africa
Gonna take some time to do the things we never had

Kari, you’re welcome.

Of course, Slade, this is already in your working knowledge.

I thought Chuck was great. Jeffster, because Jester would be associated with fools? That’s funny. And then Morgan’s lie to the triads about being level 60 was appreciated.

The one that I expect more from is Heroes. I feel like I’m at the zoo standing around, waiting for the lion to do something crazy, but instead he’s just laying on his side staring at the sky. I know he has the potential for so much more, and I don’t see him every day, but I spend a lot of time waiting. It’s not many shows that offer gritty characters with superpowers shot in non-CW film quality. Here’s hoping for tonight.

I could act like the “get back” coach on the field, yelling for the lion to hustle and “get back, get back!” I just need a cap, shorts, and a pair of tube socks. A whistle is not necessary because I wouldn’t really offer any insightful coaching, just mass encouragement.

This man sat on me in high school. He is not a “get back” coach.

But I shall still tune in to see the potential that a Super Soldier army brings.

1. Missile Command
2. You Got the Touch/Transformers theme song
3. An action montage choreographed to Rush

And I enjoyed Heroes tonight. Finally, a supervillain. “I don’t think I’m better than everyone. I am.”

I’m curious to see next Monday night. Ruing? I think so. SNL advertisements for/against candidates the night before the election. I’d be interested in a slam tally. I wish I could say that the American people aren’t influenced by media, but…

Other nerd news:
I will be watching Heroes hours before you mere West Coasters even dream of the show. I should make some “predictions”. And then next Monday I, too, shall have my powers stripped. But I will say this: our basement apartment has an HD big screen TV.

And the iQ, the 56 mpg Toyota? Yeah, it’ll be a Scion.

Petrelli? Who’s that?

Did you see that Billy Bob Thornton and Dennis Hopper are voices in a game about snakes and spiders?

I liked the movie. It was fun, even if it did borrow heavily from my favorite stories.

Now, the Heroes stream of consciousness (like Mohinder, except with less pheremones):

Rafiki’s rock paintings about Parkman are awesome.

Yes, villains! That fire guy has some of the coolest fire effects I’ve seen on a super. And the Haitian is in Germany, I guess. Villainy 101. They totally killed off Magneto too quickly, though.

“I was being awesome.” Boo to the bad sound effects in the Buster Keaton movie theater.

So sad, painting over Parkman’s happy family. And white eyes! Detective Sylar and his coffee. Decaf.

Nikki in the casket? Ah. Clones. i knew it!

“And then I’m gonna kill him.” Woot. Since we hated /got bored with Sylar, it’s intriguing how they’re re-inventing him.

Mike – with bringing down the Star Destroyer in Force Unleashed – it’s just a cutscene in the Wii version. I’ll bring the game over next time before you buy it. I enjoy the game.

Also, I guess we’re all connected – through the Petrelli family. Who isn’t their brother?
I was off on the Noah Bennet shooting Nathan Petrelli, but our commentors got it right. (We’re still number one for the “Who shot Nathan Petrelli?” and “Who killed Nathan Petrelli?” in Google. Woot!)

Let’s look at our predictions:

1. Elle a hero?

She’s now being fired from Primatech after her dad’s murder and took on Sylar

2. Love for Mohinder?

Awkward! He now makes me uncomfortable. I hope that the girl who causes death through oil-eyes and the guy who’s falling apart are happy together. Yes, Devin, he will have blue fur. Or become Dr. Manhattan-esque as pure energy. Well, he’s already naked enough. Hopefully he keeps his Expositional Monologue +2 power bonuses.

3. Return of the Haitian? (George Lucas’ other venture)

Linderman came back. Why not? But only at deus ex machina appropriate times.

4. Sylar (much to all of our lament) will probably not die

Yeah, now that he’s got whatever Claire’s got, they even mention that they’re not able to die. Unless another Highlander confronts them.

5. West is Nathan’s Son?

Who isn’t? And can Nikki freeze people?

6. Claire’s really Adam’s daughter, not Nathan’s?

I was very glad to see that the vision of the future included Adam. And character death of a Vector Prime magnitude.

7. Micah and Molly become love interests?
8. Micah trained by WiFi?
9. To add my own: Super-fast girl will be Hiro’s archnemesis.

That’s a given. I’ve thought a lot about speedsters with Stutter. I love how the papers fluttered to the ground, although I think she needs to leave traces of friction fire behind her. I do dig the bouncing soundwaves/threads, though.

With regards to the viewer-created Heroes – The female is the same as Hiro. Santiago, on the other hand, has some potential with his predicting possible outcomes. Finally we can see a director do a good job with something like Paul Atreides of Muad’dib fame.

I would love to see a picture of Darth Ando (or even an Ando Calrissian) fighting a Star Wars Boy Hiro (complete with broomsticks).

Another fun highlight was the commercial for Bedtime Stories. Directed by Adam Shankman of Step up 2 the Streets 2? Hairspray? So You Think You Can Dance?

If you remember, Devin and The Master Predictor had some great insight for this season of Heroes. Here’s a quick re-cap if you’re like Peter (and myself, to be honest) and will only browse quickly through an RSS reader.

1. Elle a hero?
2. Love for Mohinder?
3. Return of the Haitian? (George Lucas’ other venture)
4. Sylar (much to all of our lament) will probably not die
5. West is Nathan’s Son?
6. Claire’s really Adam’s daughter, not Nathan’s?
7. Micah and Molly become love interests?
8. Micah trained by WiFi?

To add my own: Super-fast girl will be Hiro’s archnemesis.

And someone will die. And Jack Bauer will have to go rogue against CTU in order to get past bureaucracy to defeat a terrorist.

I think Cloak and Dagger may have injected me with the MGH. Here’s what’s really fun. My foot didn’t fit on the X-rays. The pictures look like I have no tips to my toes. To get a better angle, the lab tech set up the X-ray shot at a weird perspective. The lab tech hid behind a wall, leaving me on the platform, while she clicked the trigger.

If I can suddenly walk through walls or attract metal objects to my foot, it’s not my fault.

The Haiku
Mild-mannered goofball
Gets sudden dose of X-Rays
Lab tech ran and hid

1. In James Patterson’s Maximum Ride, the mysterious whitecoats and labs are cool. They add intrigue and mystery to Max and her flock. Where the series really develops, though, is when specific whitecoats rise to fight them. The high action and, frankly, one of the reasons the series is successful, revolves around the conflict with the Erasers. But if the Erasers remained faceless/nameless, they’d just be Stormtroopers. Ari, on the other hand, builds a connection for you, makes you almost sympathetic for a villain, and makes Max’s choices all the more catching. Her virtue blossoms around Ari the villain.
2. In Superman comics and movies, Superman does amazing things (almost super things). He races missiles, lifts helicopters, and even turns back time (and returns from the dead). But Supes is at his best when fighting Luthor. Luthor, epitome of brains and conniving, always pushes Superman to his limits, sometimes even forcing Superman to choose who to save. Sure, you’ll have your alien/experimental threat that is basically a test of super power levels, but Luthor has staying power. The original Action Comics portray Superman as kindof, well, a jerk. (I’m thinking of one instance where the secretary won’t let Superman see the mayor…so he busts down the door.) Superman needs chances to vent his superness. If not, he’s just a bully.
3. Do you remember Odysseus shooting the suitors through the throat or do you remember Circe and the Cyclops? (If you’re Devin, you answer, “Yes.” to both.) The mega-villains are memorable. How about Hercules? When I say ‘Hercules’, do you think ‘Hydra’ and the gods standing in his way or do you think ‘cleaning uber-stables’? What makes The Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan stand out is Percy’s reactions to Ares, Zeus, and Medusa and his choice to not stoop to their level.
4. Villains are not always the exact obvious opposite, like Luthor and Superman. Moriarty is just as smart as Sherlock Holmes. That’s what makes him deadly and helps us to sympathize with what would have become just another pretentious violin playing detective. What was the most memorable Sherlock Holmes scene? Yeah, you’ve got the hound, but true fans can remember the sword duel atop the waterfalls.
5. The original Mario Bros. was pipes with crabs and turtles. But want it Super? You’ve got castles and a fire-breathing dragon/dinosaur/gecko. Bowser made it personal by kidnapping the princess, as well as other taunts that grow throughout the series of games.
6. But it’s not just the villains. Heroes are always joined by foils, like Robin is to Batman or Horatio is to Hamlet. In one of the first fiction epics, Gilgamesh is joined by Enkidu the Wild Man. Humbaba the Tree Giant is a great villain, mainly because Enkidu and Gilgamesh have to team up to win. The villain demonstrates the connection between the super team.
7. By fighting darkness, the hero stands out. Han Solo is awesome, and would overshadow Luke as the hero, if not for Darth Vader. Such a cool villain makes the hero even cooler just by being around. If not for Vader, Luke would still be hanging around Tashi Station looking for power converters. Ben Kenobi and Yoda train Luke not for a confrontation with the Emperor but for Vader. Vader can only be beat by love. The Emperor can be beat by elevator shafts.

In conclusion, I am stoked for Volume 3 of Heroes.

If you are part of the hundreds (thanks for the heads up, Site Meter) who just tuned in within the last few hours, make sure to check out the coping skills that we provide, as well as expert analysis by The Master Predictor and Devin, Benevolent Dictator.
If you really love us and want to support more Heroes/the culture of “my people” updates, buy Heroes:Saving Charlie (the continuation of Hiro and Charlie the Waitress’ love), the Peter Petrelli/Milo Ventimiglio Poster, or Hiro Nakamura/Takezo Kensei’s sword or pretty much anything Heroes related.

The Haiku
Whoa whoa whoa slow down
Okay. We don’t talk about
that EVER again.

Lots of great lines and situations. Thank you, Tim Kring, for giving us semi-closure. I love the whole “Volume Two/ Volume Three” thing.

Petrelli making a lightning sword, casting people aside like Legolas meeting Theoden, catching the vial, and turning into Darth Peter against the safe. Adam maniacally wanting another flood. “Flying man!” “Who’s this guy supposed to be?”

Buried alive in a graveyard like Megatron, boy!

And with Claire’s blood helping to stop 138, you save the cheerleader…yadda yadda.

After I made the Haiku, I thought Nikki (“dying” in a fire that DL could have saved her from). And when Nathan got up to make the world changing speech, I knew he was going Teddy Roosevelt. When the touching (not sarcastic) montage happened, his death was certain.

But what was with Mya’s “World Greatest Dad” apron?

I also love the graphic novel continuation.

[begin viral marketing campaign that is becoming less edgy]

And what show has its own surveillance camera? You can check out more information about Bennet on the PrimaTech site. Highlight the logo and you get the Kensei symbol/helix. You need to call 1-800-PRIMA16 to get things started. The username is ‘bennet’, the password is ‘claire’.

The username is always going to be bennet, but the passwords are:
#C3001 – Hana Gitelman/Wireless
Password: HGghx11a

#C3002 – Matt Parkman
Password: MPggtn75x

#C3003 – Theodore Sprague
Password: TSntz14b

#C3004 – Gabriel Gray
Password: GGeh81zu

Hanna has her own site.

As a public service to our faithful readers, we on the editing staff have decided to provide some steps to take to cope in the “no Heroes on TV” interim (or, as well call it, The Long Dark Tea Time of the Soul).

Try a couple and know that you are not alone (unless you like Sylar, ’cause then we can’t be friends).

1. Go to a department store dressing mirror and yell at “Jessica”.
2. Riding in an elevator, grab your temples and curl up in pain, screaming,”Stop! I can’t let you have Molly!”
3. Storm gallantly into McDonald’s claiming to be “Takezo Kensei the Sword Saint, here to restore the McRib to the regular menu” (a suitable alternative would be “reclaiming the righteousness of the Double Cheeseburger on the dollar menu”).
4. Pretend that Matthew Fox can stop time.
5. Mourn the absence of Nitro and Diamond on January 6.(woo, American Gladiators/Running Man)
6. Jump off your mom’s roof wearing a red towel.
7. Threaten to release strain 138 on the world population if more reality shows result from the writer’s strike.
8. Two words: Potato Flippin’ Gun
9. Create an Excel spreadsheet on the death tolls of a Self-Proclaimed Adam versus Kara Thrace Leading Humanity to Earth. Bar graph!
10. Watch kids argue about who gets to run the Nation and who gets to sign the waiver to avoid a lawsuit.
11. Know that Claire’s blood can help her dad, can bring back any hero that dies in the finale, but can’t bring Katee Sackhoff back to NBC.
12. Obsess about 1-18-08 Cloverfield like the Internet fanboy that you are…did you check out our other articles?
13. Put a globe on your kitchen table. Shine a flashlight on it. Spin the globe, saying,”Previously…” and then bust out with your Powers of Exposition
14. Write a haiku a day until the next season about how you were just starting to get to know Alejandro.
15. Put an AOL CD in your microwave for one minute and say, “Are you proud, Daddy?”
16. Sleep naked on the docks. If anyone bothers you, claim amnesia.
17. Know that Churck Bartowski just got another nine episodes.

If you are part of the hundreds (thanks for the heads up, Site Meter) who just tuned in within the last few hours, make sure to check out the finale insight that we provide, as well as expert analysis by The Master Predictor and Devin, Benevolent Dictator.
If you really love us and want to support more Heroes/the culture of “my people” updates, buy Heroes:Saving Charlie (the continuation of Hiro and Charlie the Waitress’ love), the Peter Petrelli/Milo Ventimiglio Poster, or Hiro Nakamura/Takezo Kensei’s sword (Amazon will sell anything).

And yes, Parkman did steal it from Petrelli’s brain.

And Sulu will live on as long as Hiro pursues justice. Great casting of Young Hiro, by the way, NBC.

(The alternative ending word:
)

Tell me – Who is Hot or Not?

Who is hotter, West (Claire’s Flying Boy) or Peter (Irish girl’s future protector)

A battle between brothers. Who is hotter, Peter Petrelli (nurse) or Nathan Petrelli (senator)?

Who is hotter, washed-up Nathan or jacked-up Nathan?

Who is blech-ier, Nightmareman Parkman or Heebyjeebyman Sylar?

Who is pluckier, Hiro, Ando, or the Archaeologist?

Who creates more Olsen-esque “You got it, dude!” vibe, Baby Parkman, Molly, or Micah?

Who is a more complex anti-hero, Bob or Adam Monroe (Drunk Kensei)?

Ultimate Showdown

Who is the hottest guy on Heroes, Suresh, Peter, or Alejandro’s Warden?

Yes, Alison, I write this to entertain you.

The Haiku
No, I am not so
obsessed with the whole Hot/Not;
I laugh at myself.

The Haiku
The first episode
where I said, “Whoa! That was fast.”
‘Twas Sylar-less

My Wife’s
Blood. (Someone punched a mirror and did fulfill her prediction last week.)

Micah
Somebody’s gonna die.

My Prediction
Hiro will have more quirky adventures in the past and will be in conflict of whether he should help his hero or not, all based on the love a girl.

A new category has been unlocked:

Heroes!

Now you can search for all your Heroes info.

The Haiku
Not quite dramatic
Not quite flowing wind chimes but
Predict next Monday?

Booyor:
Nathan is the hooded man. And Alejandro will angst for Mya and maybe they’ll get separated again. And Peter will struggle with opening the box. And some paintings.

My Wife:
Nathan is the hooded man. And blood. There will be blood.

Bethany:
Someone’s going to catch on fire and, uh, not die. And maybe jump off a building.
(Folks, she doesn’t watch the show. But she is a genius.)

Teddi:
Someone will go back in time and meet the cause of all the problems.

Peter:
Jesus, duh.

Alison, what say you? Is the stolen car Claire’s?

It’s interesting that we’ve got a virus similar to the Phalanx virus that plagued the X-Men.