Things accomplished:

1. Read and dissected Act I, scenes 1-3 of Romeo and Juliet with a student I’m working with
2. Replaced the spigot for the hose at the front of the house
3. Repaired a toilet that had been constantly running
4. Ran copper sulfate through the water drainage to kill weeds in the plumbing

Then I sat down to watch the pilot episode for the original Star Trek.

You think they look weird from the front? From the back, they look like they’re wearing prosthetic behinds on their heads.

I think it’s cool that Captain Pike’s first officer is a woman. A woman in a commanding office in the military, leading an away team to rescue the captain, is pretty pioneering. Boldly going and all that.

But my five hours were up and I started to think that I was the one seeing illusions in The Cage.

My Wii won’t read discs, which, you know, is what it should do. It’s especially frustrating when you’re tired. I ordered a lens cleaner. $10 straight from Nintendo versus $38 from Amazon. Hopefully it’s just a smudged lens. It’s really tough seeing my youngest be disappointed when I have to tell her it’s not working.

Why did I need the five-hour boost?

Too much grifball. This is Slade running it in to score:

This was post-midnight. It’s summer, right?

I gifted the channel to some people that I thought might like it. It’s free to anyone; I just gifted it because it’s really easy to download then (like sending you a link, but with an Italian plumber hitting his head against bricks).

Today was Nintendo’s E3 press conference. I got to watch it live (via streaming) and go crazy right alongside the people in the audience. Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword looks great, as anticipated. The controls were a little off and the demo guy told the audience to turn off all wireless devices, making fun of the trouble Steve Jobs had connecting to the Internet during the iPhone reveal.

Kirby: Epic Yarn has an amazing style. Every character is made from a piece of string.

EA Sports Active 2.0 looks cool. It’s completely wireless and one of the controllers is a heart-rate monitor, checking more accurately how efficient your workout is. It also has the ability to coordinate data online like the Nike+iPod system.

The big reveal for me, though, was GoldenEye. I remember my residents at NAU playing this for hours on end in the days of the Nintendo 64. It retained the split-screen multiplayer but now includes 16 online types of matches. I’ll be curious to see if FORZO (or whatever Slade calls himself now) and I can play online versus the world.

Oh. And the portable game system that can take 3D photos and play 3D movies and games.

Sunday we had our birthday celebration. Yeah, some things have happened in the past few months. During one of the conversations, J’s youngest brother agreed to a spontaneous haircut.

He went from Tired Aquatic Mad Scientist to In a Similar Manner to Lincoln Brewster. I think we should have gone more David Crowder.

Writing is going well. I’m already 100 pages into my second round of edits.

I must admit, I prefer editing paper with a red pen versus editing on the computer screen (you know, with a cursor…Taciturna disagrees with me writing on the monitor). When your book’s 220+ pages, that’s quite a bit of paper for each go around.

Devin, your Colors of the Wind morning song might be a call to arms from the Forest Guardians to enact Captain Planety justice.

I don’t know if I had high expectations for Glee last night. I wonder if my enjoyment of an episode is dependent on if I like the songs they cover. And yes, Gleek is a dumb name.

Last night’s episode especially left me with some awkward “trust me, last season had some cool parts” moments today.

One staff member complained that the episode was too theatrical.

Pause

I got to watch Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker with my daughters. I am really enjoying Netflix on Wii. My wife and I go back and forth with what movies to get for the kids: she always votes for movies about sharing and dancing whereas I want to raise kids that can jump kick. Netflix gives us both.

If you didn’t see the Twitter feed, a mother duck (which hints at vulgarity) with a bunch of ducklings walked through our neighborhood on my way home from school. I debated picking them up to take them to safety but figured if they got this far I didn’t want to disturb the Circle of Life. You know, in case any Forest Guardians were in the vicinity.

I took a picture with my phone. If I was cool like sidewalkdriver I would have a 100xkajillion telephoto lens SLR in my Scion at all times.

Jeremy brought over the Netflix disc for the Wii to try out. Now I can stream Giant Octopus versus Mega Shark from the comfort of my couch. The movie stars Deborah Gibson and Lorenzo Lamas, both known for Academy Award-worthy performances.

Just like these guys:

We also tried out the violin tonight. It’s a lot of fun, but I know I wasn’t playing it right. Hey. At least it’s not a clarinet.

The estate sale is this Saturday from 6:30am-2pm at
10510 W. Desert Forest Circle
Sun City, Az. 85351

We have listed it with Craig (whoever that guy is) so the whole Interwebs is invited.

Nintendo has announced the 3DS, a handheld system that will project 3D images but not require a pair of glasses.

Iwata is checking out, however, if playing games in 3D for an extended period of time causes health problems (Slade, imagine us in our Borderlands feast, now with Skags jumping out of the screen).

It will also have a camera (perhaps two for depth perception) and a motion sensor. Nintendo gave the vague “it will come out before summer 2011” release date.

It seems cool, although Nintendo’s philosophy of less expensive products sometimes translates into not having the most recent tech advances hardware wise (design wise they are cutting edge). It’s great creativity, but I wish there could be a happy merge of the Wii and the PS3.

My wife and I beat the new Super Mario Bros. game, so if you have any recommendations for a good co-op Wii game (in short supply, surprisingly enough) send them my way. The good thing with Mario is that you can keep going back to any level and still have a considerable amount of fun.

While searching for details about LEGO Star Wars III, I’m annoyed that I fell asleep during 30 Rock last night:

Let’s hear it for Hulu.

What? You can watch episodes of the Clone Wars online? When did this happen? I’m so behind. Not that I’m an uber fan of the cartoon, but it would have been nice to know after the third time in a day watching the Don Knotts episode of the Muppets. (If you listen to the podcast there’s a reference to Sweetums. That’s not on accident.)

The irony of all-out Nerf warfare on the show did not escape my sense of timeliness.

Okay, so maybe some spoilers from me, but Nerf is not integral to the plot.

Or is it?

Thanks to everyone who listened to my beautiful wife on the radio. I’m proud. And for those that may wonder if celebrity has caused her to ignore the little people, she still helps us out:

This is how my wife clamped down the lining for my orthopedic insert for the glue to dry.

Video game news: If you haven’t gone to Gamestop yet to get your free demo disc of Monster Hunter 3, you need to. I initially set out to play a Final Fantasy-esque protagonist with a giant sword:

but the camera angle (which doesn’t rotate with you…unless it’s an unseen option) couldn’t keep up with the hunt.

I’m not too proud to admit that I switched to the hunter with the shotgun. Those poor herbivores never saw it coming.

On the topic of Final Fantasy, FFIV (or II if you were like me and bought the original cartridge back at Babbage’s) released on the Virtual Console today. Airships and dragoons are always fun additions to the party. I didn’t pick it up (since I still have the original cartridge) but I’m holding out for the actual FFII and III for the Virtual Console. Is it sad that I’m more excited for those than the big release of Final Fantasy XIII this week? (And yes, Dad, I know that since there’s 13 of them, Final is not an appropriate adjective. Don’t get me started on the Crystal Chronicles spin-off.)

Like in traditional bloggh format, we’ll celebrate today’s posting achievement with a song:

Seriously. Who knew politicians were so entertaining? And applause for rhyming “preterite” with “Connecticut”.

This came across my e-mail today:

Choreographing all of those middle schoolers is actually pretty impressive. I also would love the compliment of some kid holding up my book and screaming while pointing at it.

The related videos on the “district appropriate video service” (YouTube being completely blocked) made me laugh:

In video game news:

Did you see the kid who created a strategy guide for Zelda – for people who can’t see?

The impossible is only the untried.

Also – the Playstation Smartphone should debut sometime this year. This year will also see Mario Galaxy 2 and Metroid: Other M.
What is Nintendo going to release for Christmas? Probably Zelda.

Finally – You’ve gotta love Yahoo tech blogs.

Regardless of it’s sales, it’s still fun to play.

Which it’s is it, people?

March 8 – Free Monster Hunter demo disc at GameStop
May 23 – Super Mario Galaxy 2
June 27 – Metroid: Other M

On June 14 the DS will have a “game” called 100 Classic Books that will let you read public domain classic books. The $19 price tag is cheap when compared to other DS games but expensive when compared to Kindle-ish apps for phones. A plus, though, is the ability to download new content via the Nintendo WFC. I’m intrigued to see how this plays out. I know that people bought a PSP just to watch movies. Will people prefer this over an iPod Touch?

Another fun mash-up from today: Buzz Lightyear as a River/Dollhouse character from Joss Whedon. He has memory loss; his altered perceptions cause him to blank out and shoot lasers at people. I believe that he is the prototype for a Firefly character.

Do you remember these clips from Sesame Street? Did that cake guy always trip? Is the cake guy Jim Henson?

Watching Sesame Street today on non-Hulu it was the habitat/40th anniversary episode. That was playing the last time I stayed home sick.

Saturday, to de-compress from our coordinating/catering, we watched the G.I. Joe movie (not the cartoon movie with Nemesis Enforcer…that would have been more realistic). Yes, I understand that the Bloggh should have certain standards and now I have learned my lesson.

Here’s the set-up: Cobra creates genetically-engineered fearless soldiers. So, if they’re so fearless, why do they scream in panic when they fall down a conveniently-placed shaft and/or have a grenade shoved under their collars? Next time, can I get hired to read over the script? $10 for a quick run-through. Was it supposed to be gritty or cheesy? The language says gritty. The impalements say gritty.

Seriously: next time you watch the film, keep a tally of how many people get impaled in the movie. Double the score for each time the spike is revealed stabbing through another device, like a datapad/pillar/Hummer.

I don’t care what anyone tells you, take it from me: Marlon Wayans is cheesy in the film. Plain and simple.

I was okay with one thing they changed about the franchise, though. I like that Zartan can switch faces. The action figure just turned a sickly blue in the sun. But replacing the president as a shapeshifter? X2 did that well with Senator Kelly. Heroes copied that. G.I. Joe copied that. Through the Xerox effect, the initial luster has dulled and the copy has become muddled and inky.

I also broke down and got Tomena Sennar for my brother’s bachelor party. Yes, it is as psycho as advertised. It was a great way to keep the guys’ attention while we waited for Mike to bail us out with Rock Band 2. With the left-over WiiPoints, I sent Mega Man 3 to myself. I hadn’t played that game for 15-20+ years. I beat Tomena Sennar before I went to bed on Friday night.

Let’s just say video games have been dumbed down over the years. My wife laughs at me losing horribly to a game I could beat as an elementary school kid.

And yes, Chaarli, today’s wootshirt is very librarian-esque:

I don’t use Netflix at all. The times when I do watch movies are the $1 Redbox ones. I don’t think we’ve ever gotten up to $9 worth of rentals. Before I commit I’d have to see how many TV shows the Wii version of Netflix would offer.

(The ability to have any Disney film a Wiimote click away would be pretty cool, though. Then my kids wouldn’t be watching Little Mermaid repeatedly.)

It’s supposed to come out in Spring.

A big announcement if you ever hung out with me at Peter Piper Pizza during junior high and/or are my brother/roommate from college.

NBA Jam is coming to the Wii. It’s going to be in stores, versus a digital download, so we might see some new content. I would be okay having Kevin Johnson take on Hakeem Olajuwon again (remember that dunk? I do.)

For my brother’s sake, I hope they let Kobe be a playable character. I remember that Michael Jordan had his own licensing, so the biggest #23 fan (the only #23 fan) in the family had to choose between Scottie Pippen and some guy with goggles.

How many sites mentioned Horace Grant today?

I could mention how I modeled myself as a player after Mark West, making three obscure basketball references, so that the announcer could yell, “The bloggher’s on fire!!!”

But I wouldn’t want to get a big head. [rimshot]

1. A software developer will release a compilation of party mini-games for the Wii.
2. The PS3 will welcome a game that has excessive amounts of entrails and nudity, garnering a Mature rating. I will still question the ESRB as to why sociopaths are not valued as the paragon of maturity for our society.
3. The XBOX360 will add a game to its library where the hero has a machine gun and the entire game’s perspective is from behind that gun. It will be hailed as the most innovative game of the year.
4. A country with nuclear (or even nuculear) weapons will threaten the US. Our population will not be able to identify the country on an unmarked map (unless the country was featured in an XBOX game).
5. In the light of my disappointment at space stations in the year 2001, I’m guessing that the manned mission to Saturn to find the Star Child will probably be postponed until some time after 2010.
6. Universal Health Care will not be as universal as advertised. The Star Child’s mother will still be paying towards a huge deductible from the Star Hospital, due to an error in a DRG code.
7. A celebrity will die and the news will run the person’s picture for a week. Thousands will die from hunger-related complications each day, receiving minimal media coverage. Money from the celebrity’s funeral could have fed a significant amount of those people. (Oh, am I ranting on the bloggh? That’s never happened before.)(Here’s one of the scariest Excel spreadsheets ever.)
8. A sports player will get arrested.
9. One local professional team will do well while the rest sit in mediocrity.
10. Erin Hunter will publish five books about a cat civil war. I, on the other hand, will be thankful to publish one book (not necessarily about a cat civil war).
11. I will lobby for nutmeg to be the main ingredient for every family meal.
12. Disney will release another Buddies movie. (We’re watching one of the four-pack that my mom got my daughters. Gee. Thanks, Mom.)
13. Chuck will rock.
14. We all thought Apple was releasing a tablet. Nope. Mind-control device.
    
15. We’ll start bracing for teenage adolescence. The next decade makes me nervous.
16. I will replace my torn-ligament foot with a giant metal claw.
17. I will update something called a “bloggh” from time to time.

Ten years ago I was a Resident Assistant in a Freshman dorm, hung out with this hot girl who bought me donuts, and played Final Fantasy VIII in Mike’s room until insane hours of the morning.

Things have progressed, as I now have my own assistant in my library, I married the hot girl with the donuts, and I play Star Wars in Mike’s living room until insane hours of the morning.

Ten years from now I will have a famous book about a toilet in an elevator (old RA joke), my hot wife will be baking health-smart donuts (I’ll be 40, after all), and I will probably be obsessing over some nerd entertainment in Mike’s holodeck. (It will be something akin to when Picard thought he was Robin Hood, but we will find some way to turn Riker to the Dark Side. Consider the beard.)

Did you know that ten years ago I had been asked if I could grow a goatee? The rest, as they say, is history.

Can I add that the scales are imbalanced? For every survival horror game invoking a flashlight, it should be federal law requiring the release of a game revolving around nunchuk combat and/or two WiiMotes being used as John Woo guns.

Other game topics:
Did you see the tonberry cake?

How about the Marriage Program, complete with USB cupcakes?

Oh, semicolons. You make things happen.

Check out these and deformed turkeys at Cake Wrecks.
Makes me hungry for a M Crib. Right, Mike?

It is four players on screen at the same time. Yes, player one has to be Mario. Yes, the game gets psycho quickly, with turtle shells all over the place. Yes, you will die a lot.

As long as you know that going in, you should be fine.

If you liked Super Mario World or Super Mario Bros. 3, you’ll like the game. I’m excited to play this with Slade on Thanksgiving. But don’t take my word for it. Here’s my nephew’s review:
“It’s frickin’ hard.”

“In 2010, Activision publishing is expected to release a strong product line of innovative new titles,” Tipple said. “The diversified lineup will include, among others, titles based on the best-selling franchises in the company’s history, including Call of Duty, Guitar Hero, Tony Hawk, Shrek, and Spiderman, and a select few new intellectual properties such as Blur and Singularity, and a strong catalog based on our top sellers of 2009.”

You might want to also look up “innovative”.

They also make the Dance Dance Revolution games.

What would happen if you combined all those games into one simple essence that can be played by just using one button? That is Tomana Sanner, a game out in Japan right now that is crazy popular.

Crazy popular in a country that brought you that Laser Cheese Guy.

Here’s are some screenshots from Tomana Sanner to clear things up:




Click on the thumbnails to see a bigger picture.

Maybe the game’s description will help us decipher what’s going on:

Players take on the role of businessman Hitoshi Susumu, who finds himself very behind schedule and therefore “won’t stop running until he gets to his ultimate dance party.”

If that didn’t sell the game for you, you should know that there will be online leaderboards. You know, like if you ever wanted to compare your triceratops riding scores with the Frankenstein’s monster bowling scores of another player from across the globe.

Why am I intrigued? This is further evidence that I broke my brain writing that rhyming book.

I agree with the Ohm – lots of great broken image links, website awards banners, and even a hit counter stuck at a ridiculously low number. But what are they missing? Animated gif flames.

They did enough frames to make me sick to my stomach, though.

We’re not just limiting nostalgia to bad web design today: I haven’t been home to watch the Nintendo Channel on the Wii yet, but I guess Nintendo is releasing a 3D version of Excitebike with online multiplayer. Also, rumor has it that Activision is working on another GoldenEye game.

That’s good, because right now the biggest game my students are obsessed with right now (besides some game called “Call of Duty”) is some game where you play as a giant shark.

Thank you, Ohm, for bringing to our attention this painfully honest commercial:

Before you get too offended, check out how Rhett and Link (the guys who made the commercial) are helping out other local businesses.

Slade and I played some Borderlands last night for the first time. It has a definite tough guy thing going on, with a twangy soundtrack from Cage the Elephant (think Beck) mixed with something that could be straight out of Firefly. Tons of fun, very surreal, and very much a game for two educators who had exhausting weeks to have the freedom of busting bandit gangs on a desert planet.

As I look at the upcoming release of the multiplayer Super Mario on November 15, I find interesting Mario facts along the way. Here’s something that caught my attention:

This is something that I had heard about a while ago, but now found the box art. You know how Super Mario Bros. 2 stands out as being completely different than any in the original series of games? A dream world with a lack of turtles but instead an abundance of radishes?

Yeah, that’s because it’s a game called Doki Doki that then had the Mario ensemble thrown on top of the sprites to make it more palatable for Western audiences. (What’s really funny is Super Mario Bros. 2 then got re-released, with the Mario characters instead of Doki Doki, as Super Mario USA.) Here’s an original screenshot:

Four characters go into a dream world to fight Shy Guys, Birdo, and King Wart. If you look at the box art, you can even see the crazy mask thing that would fly around and try to get you.

Don’t worry about it being some scandalous rip-off (because I know you were about ready to file a copyright infringement complaint, right? Don’t we all?). Shigeru Miyamoto (the guy who invented Mario, Zelda, Metroid, Wii Fit, and [cough]Wii Music[/cough]) came up with Doki Doki. The music was done by Koji Kondo. You may be familiar with his work. (The youngest adventurer in the Sidewalk Driver clan might appreciate this music video.)

I can’t believe what a trade-in freak I’ve become. But…New Super Mario Bros. Wii is now cheaper. With Wii Fit Plus having the same stuff from the first Wii Fit, I traded that sucker in.

I still think Slade’s students should play this one (Uematsu, not Kondo):

Estuans interius
Ira vehementi
Estuans interius
Ira vehementi
Sephiroth
Sephiroth

Estuans interius
Ira vehementi
Estuans interius
Ira vehementi
Sephiroth
Sephiroth

Sors immanis
Et inanis
Sors immanis
Et inanis

Estuans interius
Ira vehementi
Estuans interius
Ira vehementi
Sephiroth
Sephiroth

Veni, veni, venias
Ne me mori facias
Veni, veni, venias
Ne me mori facias

Veni, veni, venias
Ne me mori facias
Veni, veni, venias
Ne me mori facias

Veni, veni, venias
Ne me mori facias
Veni, veni, venias
Ne me mori facias

Veni, veni, venias (Gloriosa)
Ne me mori facias (Generosa)
Veni, veni, venias (Gloriosa)
Ne me mori facias (Generosa)

Veni, veni, venias (Gloriosa)
Ne me mori facias (Generosa)
Veni, veni, venias (Gloriosa)
Ne me mori facias (Generosa)
Sephiroth

Estuans interius
Ira vehementi
Estuans interius
Ira vehementi
Sephiroth
Sephiroth

Estuans interius
Ira vehementi
Estuans interius
Ira vehementi
Sephiroth
Sephiroth

Sors immanis
Et inanis
Sors immanis
Et inanis

Estuans interius
Ira vehementi
Estuans interius
Ira vehementi
Sephiroth
Sephiroth

Veni, veni, venias
Ne me mori facias
Veni, veni, venias
Ne me mori facias

Veni, veni, venias
Ne me mori facias
Veni, veni, venias
Ne me mori facias

Veni, veni, venias
Ne me mori facias
Veni, veni, venias
Ne me mori facias

Veni, veni, venias (Gloriosa)
Ne me mori facias (Generosa)
Veni, veni, venias (Gloriosa)
Ne me mori facias (Generosa)

Veni, veni, venias (Gloriosa)
Ne me mori facias (Generosa)
Veni, veni, venias (Gloriosa)
Ne me mori facias (Generosa)
Sephiroth

(fade away)
Estuans interius
Ira vehementi
Estuans interius
Ira vehementi
Sephiroth
Sephiroth

I would get the original Final Fantasy, now on Virtual Console for $5, before I got DJ Hero.

I can still go crazy about the playlist, though, right?

Three DJ battle items you might be interested in:

Vanilla Ice – “Ice Ice Baby” vs. MC Hammer – “U Can’t Touch This”
Marvin Gaye – “I Heard It Through The Grapevine” vs. David Bowie – “Let’s Dance”
Gwen Stefani – “Hollaback Girl” vs. Gorillaz – “Feel Good Inc.”

I think a half hour of that would melt the Wii.

Going for this:

instead of this:

I built my routine tonight. I set it to 5 minutes with a mix of jackknifes (jackknives?), planks, and the tree stance. We’ll see how it goes tomorrow morning.

You may have seen my message about the drum major simulator. You really do flail around and people join you. The nice thing is that even though you’re flailing you’re burning calories. There are also some fun puzzle games where you’re moving the remote and the balance board in various directions.

There’s actually a pretty cool (ha ha) snowball fight that has a cover system similar to Army of Two, but you duck behind a barricade for real (and there’s not as much swearing).

The same star-based rating system is back, complete with very helpful titles bestowed upon your achievements.

After popping many beach balls and running down a robot mole, I can now be considered a Segway professional (maybe I shouldn’t brag).

The biggest excitement? Besides the workout playlist option, it will now calculate, based on what you’ve played, what you can eat.

I can now eat five saltine crackers but I’m working my way up to three marshmallows.

and what Nintendo exercise game wouldn’t be complete without me in a birdsuit?

September 22, 2009 – Police investigators sent to the home of a convicted drug dealer in Polk County, Florida found and used a Nintendo Wii console during their search, reports TampaBayOnline.

The entire act was caught on tape through a wireless security camera placed in the home where detectives were seen playing numerous frames of Wii Sports Bowling over the course of the day for about an hour.

“Obviously, this is not the kind of behavior we condone,” said Lakeland Police Chief Roger Boatner. “There was a lot of down time, but that does not excuse the fact that we should act as the consummate professionals.”

Police had reportedly placed the camera in the home as far back as December 2008.

At this time, it’s still undecided what, if any, disciplinary action will be brought upon the investigators caught playing the game.

“Certainly this was a case of bad judgment,” said Auburndale Police Chief Nolan McLeod. “We will handle it appropriately.”

The Conduit was great when it worked.

But the majority of the time in multiplayer (since the single player was fun while it lasted – but was incredibly (Army of Two) short) your character would load under the map/inside a wall.

Slade was there to witness this happen the first time. I just assumed that it was a weeping and gnashing of teeth brought upon his very existence as punishment for his sins, his vile rage, against his enemy. (To Slade’s credit, it was really tough to map the turn the other cheek action to the WiiMote.)

I guess I’m not as mature as I would believe, though. I see this photo:

and I still wonder why they would put these two people, people paid to concuss each other until loss of consciousness, so close together. If he really wanted to throw the opponent off his game, Bugs Bunny him with a big kiss.

This is yet another reason to love companies who have an obsession with white plastic. I felt the same appreciation for Snow Leopard – the slightly upgraded OS is worth the $25 I paid for it.

Thanks for not gouging us, even though you could have.

I had a weird moment yesterday when our maintenance guy started talking about Wii Sports Resort. The maintenance guy who is also a grizzled prospector (not being sarcastic) who comes to the library for old maps of our state.

I mean, how many variations on guys in tights hugging each other can you get?

Companies are trying to grab new followers, experimenting with different immersion technologies. I think this first one is very limited.

The next one just scares me.

Yes, that’s an actual patent and yes, that’s the artwork their marketing department really thought would engage the imagination.

I think that they are intending this:

for games featuring these:

where I believe that they are missing out on these:

Check out more of what happens when an x-ray tech stays after hours at the lab.

I’m sure there’s a metaphor here somewhere:

Thanks go to Devin for his cartographic curiosities.

Another Super NES star showed up today. Check out the Virtual Console for Super Star Wars today. I already have the original, but I’m glad to see that it will be preserved for a couple more years. This is probably one of the toughest games I have ever played.

So many dead womprats… I just never got how when you killed one large scorpion it turned into two small scorpions.

Rumor has it that the Check Mii Out channel will have Star Wars characters this week. I expect that Everybody Votes will finally let us figure out if Han shot first.

Which he did, you know.

You may have seen Bono’s challenging interview with Bill Hybels a while back.

I don’t know if you’ve seen the response:

In no way do I recommend living to make sure Bono is happy with us, but it is encouraging when I see people take action.

This is part of why I dig Aradhna. Their music is so different and refreshing – they also support Freedom Firm. It helped that I had recently read Sold right around the time that I hung out with the band. (And who wouldn’t want to hang out with a band in someone’s house? Coolest concert ever.)

But it seems Elvis
And my good friend Jen have had
Even stranger days

Actually, on an Obama note: I’m working on orders for the library. I chose a couple of biographies on Obama and Michelle, as well as Audacity of Hope. But, since it’s a junior high library, he’s on the order spreadsheet right alongside Ashley Tisdale, Shia LaBeouf, and the Jonas Brothers. (The majority of the biographies previously were as current as Selena and Salt ‘n Peppa.)

With Wii Sports Resort, it’s a fun purchase. My first impressions? Well, you may have heard the result from when I was racing across a rickety bridge over a waterfall to confront 13 assailants wielding red lightsabers kendo swords while listening to Battle of the Heroes cranked at MAX.

And then flying around an island strafing the golf course and basketball courts with laser fire.

What’s not to like?

Capcom vs. games, you make me laugh. Your instruction manuals promise “combos” but all I see are “flailings”. At least you’re not modifying the experience for Wii. Stay true to your insanity, Ryu. Stay true. (How old is that guy, anyways? I remember Slade and I counting quarters to buy the Super NES game. Before that, I remember playing the game in the lobby of a hotel in Disneyland.)

How many carnival game collections does one system need? I’ve stopped hoping for decent RPGs and turned to an unlikely source…books.

These are actual bundles from Gamestop.

See the responses at IGN.

and here’s a new MacBook transformer:

A relaxing time was had, although the White House has just been attacked and Jack Bauer is stuck within. Pity the terrorists. We’ll be updating as the situation unfolds. The White House is having a tough time this week. Agent Ford is on his way to track alien Conduits, one perhaps in the Oval Office, that every conspiracy theorist warned us about.

Before we go any further, though, I guess everybody decided to go crazy while we were gone.

Cute photos are here.

Ants invaded our home, but our man on the inside eliminated them with reckless abandon. Uncle G, Master of Teras Kasi.

Celebrities…well, you know. I still think repeating clips of a guy as a zombie can come off as insensitive to his family when he just died. I could be wrong.

Square Enix unveiled a teaser site with a countdown, some artwork, and some old school midi. Does anyone recognize the music? I’m hoping for Secret of Mana, but I could be horribly let-down. A co-op RPG…and on the Wii? I think I ask too much. It’s not like we had the technology to do that back in 1993, right? Oh.

Capcom has 1560. I think that’s how many Street Fighter vs. Marvel vs. SNK vs. the GOP they’ve made so far. The heavy breathing gives it away.

Every video game company decided to merge into a mega-company, as we have foretold.

Once you’ve done that, listen to Neil Gaiman read The Graveyard Book in its entirety. Newbery!

You may have seen that our politicians don’t always agree.

The legislature of Arizona approved a budget June 4. We can start planning for the school year, right? Not yet.

We have three branches of government (checks and balances still rock, even if we don’t wear powdered wigs anymore).

The legislature is holding onto the budget. It’s like a game of keep away, where they keep looking like they’re going to give the paper to her, and then they pull it back quickly.

It’s actually more like a game of chicken. We’re waiting to see who’s going to be responsible for shutting down parts of Arizona government. Who will flinch?

Who will have the stinky hot potato budget in their hands when the June 30 Catch Phrase buzzer goes off?

One branch of government is suing another branch of government and asking the remaining branch of government to mediate.

“I’m not speaking to you. Judicial Branch, will you tell Legislative Branch to give me the budget?”

“Judicial, you tell Executive that we can do what we want. I’m going to hold my breath until she says that she loves me.”

I think we may have a possible cause for low voter turn-out. There’s an attitude that politicians follow their own interests and not the interests of the people of the Republic – that the population doesn’t feel represented/that their vote affects policy. Intriguing…

And then we see goofy school districts doing stuff like this. I feel like mentioning that not all of us subscribe to the rubber room philosophy.

While I was looking up the details about the Arizona Supreme Court, seeing if I could find anything in the Supreme Court online records about the budget case…imagine my surprise at what I stumbled across.

The Public Access Case Lookup.

I searched myself and thankfully none of the atrocities committed under the Booyor banner were listed, but one guy who shares my first and last (but not middle) name should probably lay off the alcohol – forever.

Look up your name. Tons of fun for the whole family. Gotta love public access court documents provided by our government.

I know that we’ve been very focused on the Iranian elections (which I’m glad that crimes normally ignored are being brought to light) but I find it interesting that people haven’t been intrigued by what’s going on with North Korea, Myanmar, and China.

View Larger Map

A cargo ship, the Kang Nam, is heading to Yangon, Myanmar but may have to refuel at Shanghai.

Here are the complications: there’s a U.S. destroyer (the USS John McCain, ironically enough) following the ship to see if it has illegal cargo. After North Korea tested nuclear weapons and launched a missile in May, the UN has sanctioned North Korea from shipping nuclear weapons-type stuff. If they have that junk, the ship is to be redirected to a port of Pyongyang’s (North Korea version of Washington, D.C.) choosing to be searched.

North Korea has been saying that this would be an act of war.

We’ll see what happens with the port authority of Shanghai. I wonder if North Korea’s testing the sanctions like a one year-old tests if you’ll make them finish lunch (not like I have any experience, right?) or if they’re just waiting for the U.S. destroyer to slip up.

I should be careful with my comparisons to big news events with immature acts. I don’t want to pull a Hoekstra. He posted an exaggeration on Twitter:

Iranian twitter activity similar to what we did in House last year when Republicans were shut down in the House.

and an entire site was born:

I actually have only played the games on someone else’s machine – I’ve even played Super Bombad Racing, if you can believe the levels of Star Wars fandom. I remember hanging out in a Toys ‘R Us on a double date playing Rogue Squadron II on a demo Gamecube.

These are games where you play as Wedge Antilles and you visit planets like Bakura to interact with Tycho Celchu. This is the Expanded Universe.

There was a new Rogue Squadron game being developed for Wii by Factor 5. Then Factor 5 went bankrupt. To avoid surrendering their assets (in the process doing some shady business) they set a fake company called Blue Harvest and started transferring source code to the servers of that company.

Blue Harvest? Really? Like a mild Star Wars fan couldn’t pick up on that.

You might as well have hid the plans in an R2 unit. No one would have seen that coming.

I put up a review of Catching Fire on the professional site.

One week until Conduit’s release. I am excited for a co-op game for my wife and I, though. The new Super Mario looks promising, and perhaps the next Ultimate Alliance could be good. I’m not current on my printed comics. Wasn’t Captain America dead? Now he’s back?

Japan is now going to have movie rentals on the Wii.

I guess I shouldn’t be blown away by the response to Mike’s Ghostbusters III group on Facebook. Since he ain’t afraid of no ghost, it’s the only logical progression. I do like Wil Wheaton’s thoughts on the busting of ghosts:

If there’s something strange in your neighborhood, you should call the police, contrary to what the song suggests.

I also appreciate his thoughts on current events:

Pretty sure the City of Los Angeles can find a better way to spend a million dollars than on a parade. Teachers come to mind.

It’s not that I don’t like the Lakers (I always forget, from time to time, that there are professional sports ever since the NBA started playing on cable instead of free TV).

But I am a fan of irony, and I guess some other Twitterers agree with something interesting that I noticed this weekend:

Riots in the same weekend. What do you stand for, Lakers or fair elections? #iranElection

Catching Fire has reminded me of what large masses of angry people look like.

Thanks to everyone who re-tweeted that. It’s been crazy watching Twitter hold CNN accountable for going light on the coverage of world events. They focus on Iran if it relates to something gossipy, but now the public demands more info on a government that cracks down on free speech.

On the topic of free speech (literally free…no cost to you, right?):
Shi Weihan was arrested for printing Bibles for free, which I guess is illegal in China still. Argh.

I’m intrigued by Kiva. I’m not a big fan of throwing money at a problem, but I know what it’s like to have an expense come up.

I must also confess that I am entertained on Twitter with pictures of director Adam Shankman with his dog on the movie set watching 3D monitors for Step Up:

as well as finding it fun that Miley Cyrus watches Funniest Home Videos to cheer herself up.

Keep those last two secrets to yourself.

This slipped past my mind, even after completing my Wii Fit regimen this morning.

Video games are a great escape. You can be whoever you want to be (or close to it…the barbarian librarian with a laser sword is still in the concept-development stage) and perform feats that would normally cause you great injury.

But as we get into more motion-based game controls, we run the risk of creating fewer games for people whose minds are free but their bodies are not. Someone who is wheelchair bound, but has control of the hands, will not be able to pantomime their foot like a car accelerator.

How is Natal going to handle assistive devices, like what some have to use to drive a car in real life?

A positive, though, is the voice recognition technology. If we can get computers to recognize voices near flawlessly, we can get more people hooked up to modern technology applications at a cheaper price.

It’ll be interesting to see how this all plays out. What’s really fun is watching all of the people who criticized the Wii for being a gimmick (I started out as one, when I first saw Ultimate Alliance…but then was won over by Wii Sports) now on those same video game message boards defending Microsoft (the even funnier ones being the PS3 owners, afraid that Sony will now target casual gamers…you live with your mom, now she’s going to frag you in Resistance-type fears). It’ll be great when the creativity, innovation, and execution of great storylines will be the determining factor, and not hardware choices.

Who am I kidding? We created this dearth of creativity by buying the same game, over and over again, with different packaging. And the companies have watched us do it and are taking notes.

8:16am – Unexpectedly booyor (via text message) school LCD projector for principal’s training
8:47am – Open up Ultra Bath for the day
9am-10am – Go crazy answering phones and troubleshooting customer questions
10:03am – Rejoice that I saved up WiiPoints – Final Fantasy: The After Years released today!!
10:26am – Fill out tax codes and invoices – much like Cecil and Golbez do all day
10:55am – Inspired to write a chapter of Vanguard; acted on it and wrote it
10:56am – Missing promised Pop Tarts
10:57am – Dementia setting in
10:58am – Realized already within the onset of delirium – see toilets everywhere I look – head rings with phone calls
11:03am – Cracking up at William Gibson’s find – submit your favorite egotistical Tweeters
11:20am – Here’s more info on Google Wave
11:37am – Whoa. Google Wave uses techniques from old school BBSes – As you’re replying to a section of “the wave” (a layered/threaded e-mail conversation) – if the person you’re replying to is logged in, as well, they will see character-by-character what you’re typing (if you have it set like that in the settings) – like what chats used to be, without waiting for “she’s typing, she’s typing…now there’s a message”. Check out at the 15 minute mark for some CRAZY ways to share photos as “pseudo-attachments” that go straight into the conversation, like a blog
1:08pm – Just got off the phone with an automated receptionist from a Canadian bath fixture supplier “Press 9 for Zed.” Zed’s dead, baby.
1:21pm – For those that haven’t heard – Monkey Island is back!
Check out the screenshots here.
1:49pm – I think of Project Natal and think of Cox Cable’s voice recognition customer service system and cringe. #XboxE3 It’ll get there, but until then, we’re going to have a lot of, “Please adjust….please adjust…scanning…please adjust” while we’re wading through the “functionality may vary” period (Just from my own experiences using Vista’s face scanner to log in to the computer.)
2:06pm – I see that Dante’s Inferno is now licensed by Electronic Arts. I don’t seem to remember so many swordfights…
2:19pm -From EA presentation livestream: “They’re the BFFs that all girls need…let’s play a game called Speed Hair Teasing” going for biggest hair?? Argh
3:29pm – Remorse at missing the Knights of the Old Republic presentation from Bioware. I’m sure that this social monster called the Internet will have photos and video up soon.
3:30pm – Perked up – Google Docs now reads .docx files
4:30pm – Reserving judgment on Crystal Bearers
4:33pm – Nevermind. Layle is a dork.
4:38pm – Okay, so @jimmyfallon will have the Natal on his show next week. That bumps it from an interesting video to something that could happen.
4:45pm – Taunted by LucasArts – “lucasartsgames @booyor you have the manners of a beggar!”
5:20pm – Wishing tub catalogs were Google indexed
5:45pm – Taking tub pricing guide. I will make this sale – I will win!!

Thanks for following today. As a reward, check out Red Steel 2 Hands-on reactions and…

The Best Star Wars Trailer Ever – revealed at E3 today

Imagine a Wii game where the studio took their time, thought through the storyline, and perhaps (wonder of wonders) have read a few books?

And they reference Cloverfield with They Live – what more do we need?

We talk of getting an ARC for Scott Westerfeld’s Leviathan (giving away galleys at BEA? Argh!). Can you imagine if I got an advanced copy of 1Q84?

What is the book about? No one knows, except that they need to buy it.

Perhaps it’s a puzzle, like this one:

Polimomce

Can you get the pictogram? It’s like one of those “head/heels” puzzles.

A hint? I’m fond of mine.

But first, the rumors are true – Target didn’t have a pre-order for The Conduit, so I gave my business to Gamestop. It does work out since Gamestop has an exclusive version of the game. I guess my ASE will look different than other versions of the game. I will say that I dig this box art better than the other.

vs.

On Tuning a Foot
The podiatrist was trying to see how healed my wife’s foot is. I guess X-rays are a little behind ultrasounds when trying to identify a break. Both were done, but I didn’t know about a third option.

Tuning forks, when vibrating and placed on a toe, will feel weird but won’t hurt. But if you have a broken bone and it starts vibrating, I guess it hurts.

Quick way to tell if you’ve broken a foot.

The foot’s still broken; she still has two weeks in the boot, but it’s like wearing a retainer. You wear it, it does what it needs to do. You don’t, it stays on longer. My wife has done a great job adjusting to life with a giant piece of metal and cloth attached to the bottom of her leg. (Although I’m pretty certain she’d like to not have ботинок массового разрушения.)

The only hope for exercise was to get up and make some food.

We’re doomed.

Slade, check out Gladiator A.D. Remember how we talked about games like Street Fighter IV getting old fast because we’re not on the same team? Split-screen arcade swordfighting. It doesn’t look very Mario-friendly, though. It’s put out by some group called HVS. I think there’s a game called The Conduit coming out sometime soon.

Check out what I found during lunch today.

Instead of saying that it’s impossible to make anything but a minigame on the Wii, these guys realize that companies like High Voltage have the right mindset. So what if lots of people buy crummy games for the Wii? If we can own the core gamer market, we can still succeed.

Slade, avert your eyes.

I’m glad that Mario and Bowser take it seriously.

Thanks to @futileohm for the find.

Also – did you hear that Cinematic Titanic will be in town on May 22-23 at the Mesa Arts Center? (Cinematic Titanic features all of your Mystery Science Theater friends.)

Cowboys and Katanas! I love that RPG!

1. I’m jealous of that guy’s house.
2. I like how it says “Internal Use Only” in the bottom right.
3. He smiles just like I do during Force Unleashed. It’s just a game, his wife tells him.
4. Post-apocalyptic comic book ninja westerns have been a horribly neglected genre on the Wii.

And, as if I wasn’t a fan of The Conduit already, there are some pretty cool screenshots up at IGN.
See More The Conduit Various at IGN.com
That is some pretty trash.

May 1 you’ll see a new option (in Japan) on the Wii. Much like what Sony wanted with Home, you’ll have your own personal space for your Mii to hang out and manage media. Your TV in the Sims-ish set-up will play actual videos downloaded from Nintendo.

My prediction? Anime. I do realize that I may be going out on a limb with such a gutsy prediction.

It seems there are also places in your virtual hangout that when you click on them take you to ads. How…exciting?

My guess is that you won’t be able to interact real-time with other people, but you’ll probably send messages to other Wiis. What would be interesting would be VC game demos on a virtual system.

It’s nice to see that the current console to popularize avatars (understanding that there was previously Second Life and Alpha World) is getting in on the virtual world idea.

Also, will the NSA approve the new First Blackberry (Blackberry One?) for Obama? It’s interesting that this article comes out alongside an article about triangulating locations for prison-smuggled phones.

One billion apps downloaded from iTunes. Craziness.

Japan’s paying immigrants from Latin America to go home and never seek work in Japan again. Spain did this, but didn’t make too many headlines. It’s interesting the types of jobs that the immigrants took:

“kitsui, kitanai, kiken” — meaning “hard, dirty, dangerous”

I can’t remember which comedian it was (or demotivational poster) that said that if your job could be replaced by a guy who doesn’t understand English, your job stinks and will probably be replaced by robots.

There’s an interesting social experiment going on with Facebook and voting. The ghost of Benjamin Franklin approves.

I see this photo and I think The Office.

There will be a LEGO Rock Band coming out, complete with customizing your minifigures for the rockers and the roadies. It’s even up for pre-ordering already.

Not joking – check out the playlist:

1. Blur: “Song 2″
2. Carl Douglas: “Kung Fu Fighting”
3. Europe: “The Final Countdown”

Might I suggest a peripheral?

Or not.

Also, classic Final Fantasy will be on the VC.

And…Alyssa Milano is the new Ghostbusters love interest.

Also, LEGO Harry Potter is in development. Will it include Deathly Hallows? Will it include actors too old to still be in secondary schooling?

No. Yes. (Although it would be cool to see a game based on just the book and not have movie references to work from. It would be like how we got to see Kashyyk in Battlefront before it was shown in Episode III.)

But where’s the Alpha Team? I think we’re due for a Wii version.

A great example of this was that we were not going to do online multiplayer at first. The team really wanted to do it, but we just didn’t have the resources to make it work. We made plan after plan, and schedule after schedule to try to make it fit, but it just could not be done in the time we had with the people we had. After PAX though, so many fans talked about how much an online mode would mean to them, our management saw that, and brought in the resources we needed to do it. It really would not have been possible without that level of excitement from the fans!

Check out using a Wiimote as a Bluetooth device to control your computer. Now if any of us actually ran Ubuntu…

The more curious thought appears in one of the comments:

Mr Bob Said,
January 17, 2009 @ 11:13 am

So it seems to me you could put a wii controller in a model airplane running ubuntu an use the x, y, z pitch roll and accelerometer to basically have a less than $100 autopilot.

Seem possible to anyone else?

But I’ve been wondering what Nintendo would come up with to solve the storage issue. I picture a sleek white external hard drive. How expensive? Will it be hard to find on the shelf?

Thankfully, Nintendo is smarter than most of the fanboys on the Internet. Instead of designing their own storage unit, they’re going to be releasing a system update that will allow you to play downloaded games from an SD card.

What’s beautiful is that everyone has motivation for SD cards to improve: cameras, phones, your mom. I’m just waiting for Scion to have an SD slot in the next xB with your iTunes library. (Oh, I miss my Scion.)

Another great feature of this is that you can have multiple cards with tons of games – or just get a 32 GB card if you’re loopy.

It’s weird to think that I carry around in my pocket a phone that has ten times the storage of my first computer.

Woo, Nintendo. And woo your Mario-lovin’ geniuses (geniusii?).

Should I add that my wife and I played Strikers Charged late into the night last night?

NEW YORK – Police were reviewing video from surveillance cameras in an attempt to identify who trampled to death a Wal-Mart worker after a crowd of post-Thanksgiving shoppers burst through the doors at a suburban store and knocked him down.

Criminal charges were possible, but identifying individual shoppers in Friday’s video may prove difficult, said Detective Lt. Michael Fleming, a Nassau County police spokesman.

Other workers were trampled as they tried to rescue the man, and customers stepped over him and became irate when officials said the store was closing because of the death, police and witnesses said.

At least four other people, including a woman who was eight months pregnant, were taken to hospitals for observation or minor injuries.

Hard to identify because of the human swarm? People bummed that a store closed because a worker died? Please don’t write this off as a New York thing.

PALM DESERT, Calif. – The shooting occurred in a crowded toy store on the traditional start of the holiday shopping season, but authorities say it wasn’t related to the bargain-hunting frenzy. Instead, two men pulled guns and killed each other after the women with them erupted into a bloody brawl, witnesses said.

Here are the AP articles for New York and California.

Granted, in California they say it’s not part of the frenzy but was instead something that they had going on before they entered the store. I think with both instances it’s a trouble inside of us before we enter the stores. It’s the same trouble inside of us that leads to tragedies like what went on in Mumbai (and the constant trouble in Pakistan). Keep in mind that this trouble is not just overseas.

The question is, what are we going to do about this trouble? It’s something that’s tugging at the back of my mind this Christmas season.

(Don’t get me wrong. I’m still very much excited for the awesomeness of an Animal Crossing (even the website changes based on time of day) that I had missed the first time around. And yes, Slade, that includes fishing tournaments which I will drag you to.)

And Peter then says, “Oh, dear.”

Then it hit me after dinner. index.php was what I put up today. index.html was from the weekend. I hadn’t removed it from the server and the browser defaulted to it instead of the .php. I had wondered why it wasn’t updating.

I’m sure this has happened to all of you.

Simple solution: delete the old file.

Also, The Conduit may have a publisher. On the Sega ftp site, they had a folder up for The Conduit, suggesting by their web presence that they will be hosting The Conduit.

I finished Force Unleashed today. There are some moments with the Apprentice theme that the same feelings occur. It does capture the Star Wars mood. And a battle damaged Vader versus the Apprentice, with Apprentice screaming, “You should have killed me when you had the chance!” as you are locking Wii Remotes quickly and savagely to push Vader back – yeah, fanboy moments galore (ever want to throw a squad of stormtroopers into a test-firing Death Star chamber?). Nice job on fanboy moments, LucasArts…now to make a classic game. We’ll see about replay value. It’s pretty much paced like a movie.

Today was the funeral for an old student from our junior high and on Sunday I have the funeral for my friend Chuck. If you see me in person and wonder if my heart is worn out, it is. Today was a good day for Star Wars. (On that topic – when are we meeting, paper and pencil friends? (Non-gamers have now assumed that I make origami companions.))

The “Happy Tech Could Help” Portion
Hey, the message from Renaissance Bible Church is up. We put it up earlier this week, but I got distracted by a Legend of Zelda theme that burned my brain. Check out their podcast for the message. Some context: the local church body that isn’t connected to Wachovia is connected to Lehman Brothers, so Matthew 6 is kinda gutsy and needed. He’ll mention how a “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” mentality is like telling someone to not think of something: they automatically think of that unwanted thing. To demonstrate, he mentions some “meal” involving bacon, syrup, and I’m assuming a defibrillator. For my non-Southern readers, substitute a steak (or, in my case, a toss up between sashimi and a Hot Pocket (although the Pillsbury Toaster Strudels bring back good memories)(Did I mention that I lost 10 pounds unintentionally using Wii Fit?)).

The Baked Goods Portion
Really, you should check out that Toaster Strudel website. Flaky crust Flash player hotspots. Peter laughs then cries.

The Proud Father Portion
My oldest got complimented in pre-school today. The teacher sat my wife down to tell her that my oldest is very artistically advanced. Woo! My daughter also has made up a word. To remember which feet her shoes go on, she calls them a backwards butterfly. Her word for that?

doval (n) – DOH-val a backwards butterfly; usage – “To remember which shoes go on which feet, ask yourself: Does this look like a doval?”

The first time she said it I thought she said dovin basal. (Refer back to The Star Wars Portion.)

The “Okay, So I’m Not Quite So Jaded, Just Cautious” Section
I went back to read my reviews of Obama’s Audacity of Hope (Review 1, 2, and 3) Even then I was jaded about this election, it was just in haiku form.

I remember enjoying the book, for the most part, but finding some key parts that bugged me. Check out the 1, 2, and 3 links for more detail. His peer evaluations for teachers has some flaws and he does clump in National Right to Life with the NRA, which makes me kinda cringe. I do (non-sarcastically) like Obama’s megalomania quote.

Innocent blood and a distaste for extremes: I wish we could take an average of the two parties. My big issue is abortion, plain and simple. It’s like a William Wilberforce abolitionist issue with me. Where were the slaveholder’s rights? Sometimes we have to infringe when it’s life-death issues. This is not a Republican/Democrat thing, because you can bet if Giuliani (or, my goodness, Bob Packwood) was the Republican option, I would not stick with party ties. Being a father of a daughter born a month early and the brother-in-law to a guy born two months early, we must be very cautious as to when we determine a person is a person. Yes, I agree with Obama that we need to increase the Family and Medical Leave Act to help with the financial burden of having a child. (Although I have more than one co-worker who is spending way too much money to adopt a child…there’s a disconnect.) Something that I think is forgotten is that rich women have abortions, too.

Check out my good friend from college (Mike, you’ll want to click) who just got accepted to be an adoptive parent.

I’m also a big proponent of feeding the poor (taking care of widows and orphans and all that). The government and big business do not have a good track record with this, both Democrat and Republican. This is why two of my mentors, Randy Alcorn and Don Miller, are sometimes at odds. (Although now seeing Donald Miller’s “Mentoring For President ’08″, I dig Don even more.)(To add info that Don Miller doesn’t have is that McCain goes to North Phoenix Baptist. I can’t see into either candidate’s heart, though.)

Check the voting records for Obama and McCain for more details.

Check out Alcorn’s and Miller’s blogs for great insights from great writers.

And continue to be annoyed by Internet rumors that smear and/or relate to how Bill Gates will pay me a million dollars for forwarding that e-mail.

Editor’s note: Can anyone do a word count? I may have rambled more than Slade rambling about Shaq. (Messing with you, fool. CAN YOU DIG IT?!)

Then Nintendo had to go and do this:

I remember when I subscribed to Nintendo Power and they had the notation for putting Metroid, Mario, and Zelda themes into Mario Paint (although I know Mario Paint never had flats and sharps). That rocked. I was also in junior high in a different era. If this is your competition with Rock Band and Guitar Hero, well… Miyamoto-san, I’m assuming that you have another target audience. (This video is targeted specifically at Slade.)

I’m actually a little afraid of what that target audience is.

So, I’m on Fall Break and I was going to get a WiiWare co-op game to surprise my wife with. World of Goo looks awesome. I love the art style to it. But at $15? This is more like a really addicting Flash game, not Mario Galaxy used at GameStop.

I so want to play this game, but I am also so cheap. I wish WiiWare games went down in price over time.

And the biggest of news?
Kevin “Every Middle-Aged Woman’s Hero” Freaking Sorbo

as
Prometheus, Alien Terrorist

I’m loving it. Ford and John Adams taking on the Greek Giver of Fire. All in all, I think it’s quite appropriate.

1. Bel Iblis
2. Mandalorians
3. Cloud City
4. Grans
5. Whiphids
6. Talz mercenary medics
7. Basilisk
8. A Gungan scoundrel missing an eyestalk, with holes in the ears, and the phrase, “Youssa gonna die!!”

All in one level.

Or a new Punch-out?

But the biggest news of all?

My Wii Fit trainer got a haircut. He lost his Highlander/Padawan knobby ponytail and instead has a haircut very similar to a certain ensign.

Mad Monster Party?

“All these nasty monsters…and Phyllis Diller!”

2. Lapti Nek playing over the speakers at a Nar Shadaa cantina in Force Unleashed. (And letting me now wear a Correllian flight suit as my outfit.)

We’re not Jedi.

Nor are most Star Wars fans trained/coordinated enough to hang with another Force user in combat. The result of 1:1 would be even more flailing/a wagglefest (wagglefest being IGN’s word, even though they had a lot of fun. I agree that the camera and graphics are annoying, but the controls and immersion are awesome and make up for the shortfalls for me. And the storyline is great Star Wars, as mentioned before.).

The controls definitely do not feel limited. I can chain together combos at will, mixing in Force powers to spice it up/advance subplots I write in my head. It feels a lot like the combat from Jedi Academy and I’m okay with that. (I liked it.)(Jedi Academy was released on Sept. 16? Interesting.)

If you’re one of my graphic design/typography friends, though, you won’t like the instruction manual. No grammar errors upon first glance, but what caught my attention was that they printed all of the screenshots at too dark of a contrast. Many times it’s just a black box with a bright line (lightsaber) in the middle.

These are just some additions to my first impressions as I sit at work. Waiting.

Today is Vans day. I have a picture of the A-Team vehicle attached to my lanyard. Perhaps not the initial intent of the spirit day.

Funny librarian patron stories real quick:

1. A student walked up to me today, no introduction, just, “If you have a problem, and if you can find them, maybe you can call…”
2. A couple of days ago a student walked up to the desk wearing the inner workings of a wall clock and clock hands on a giant chain. I told him it was awesome, since it still kept time. I also told him he couldn’t be late to anything. This is a continuation of junior high library fashion.

Since it’s all flipped, know that when I say Light Side I mean all things good about Star Wars, like Wookiees.

By Dark Side, I mean all signs of George Lucas dementia, like showing a wampa eating, the Life Day celebration, and the entire population of Naboo.

Dark Side

1. Camera unleashed – still figuring out how to lock onto characters effectively.
2. I guess Sith operate all electronic devices by using a lightsaber as a stylus
3. General Kota’s non-moving mouth – “Hey, kid, don’t be like Vader. And, um, oil can…”

Light Side

1. Starting out the game as Vader – usually it’s something that you work towards, but once the first cutscene is done you are the Dark Lord of the Sith crushing a Wookiee rebellion; pillars and ryyk blades go flying
2. Using the Wii remote to slash down troopers – Meesa likin’ da slashins Yubjub!
3. Lining up and tilting the nunchuck to the onscreen prompt actually works – and if you succeed, the Apprentice busts out some Yoda versus Dooku moves

Colorblind Mode

It turns the colored squares into different shapes.

IGN was looking for editors a while back. It looks like spellcheck took a vacation in the interim.

Wii Music? Not too exciting, but it will end up being genius. Bad spelling and an Internet meme? Like PB and J.

Recently my dad has walked into the game room while my brother and I are playing a Rainbow Six/Resistance-type game and has to walk out immediately or else pass out.

Here is a list of games that make me motion sick. Here, as I approach a landmark birthday this school year. Here, as I thought would never happen. Here, as I desperately need to try a rollercoaster to give me hope. Here, a list of why I am old-fogeyfiying:

1. 
   TimeSplitters – I got this one in the $5 bin at Circuit City while Jeremy and I were picking up tapes for a filming gig. Split-screen four player capture the flag madness: Excellence in a PS2 bargain game. But play it in singleplayer story mode and it’s a different story. A mansion full of zombies: Lose my brain? Nope, just my lunch. This game actually makes me sweat (like when I saw Dracula at the Herberger in high school), I get so nauseous.
2. 
   TimeSplitters: Future Perfect – More storyline and more quickly rotating nausea
3. 
   Sonic Heroes – To its credit, when my wife and I sat down to play this for the first time, I had on Japanese audio and Spanish subtitles.
   And then the screen began to pulse to techno while giggling rodents freefell through gumdrops and lollipops. Not confident in just that, they started moving faster, screaming in Japanese the whole time. Thankfully I borrowed this one from my brother so I didn’t feel too bad shelving it after 30 minutes.
4. 
   Gyrostarr- I downloaded this WiiWare title last night to play with my oldest. Co-op shooter on the same screen, not big penalties for death, we were having fun. And then we got to level 5. I had to look away for a while; my daughter held down the fire button with one hand while she flipped through a Precious Moments coloring book with the other. Click here to experience the wonder of Gyrostarr

Not too old for video games, just the psycho ones.

I was all psyched to watch the Olympics and then multiple people ruined the China versus USA basketball results (the only event I wanted to watch). I then read about the adult diapers that the drummers in the opening ceremonies had to wear and I checked out. It was fun to think of continuous coverage on my TV, but after a minute I would always get bored.

And hey…I read Siddhartha. I have an attention span.

I reserved my copy of Force Unleashed today. I don’t know if I could handle the Wii Fit shenanigans again. With Target you buy a $5 gift card to reserve a copy for seven days. That $5 gets applied to the purchase of the game…and a wall cling of a Sith apprentice! Where would I put that?

Oh. The Star Wars room.

Yep. Nerdy librarian. Generation Dead is right up your alley, Devin.

On Saturday we went to a friend’s birthday party and played Citadel. It’s a city building game where character cards give you special abilities. I was a fan of the Assassin and Tax Collector hanging out at my Docks and Fortress. Throw a Warlord into the mix if someone already grabbed one of my favorite characters and fun was had.

I also thought that it was funny that it’s possible to make an exact likeness of NAU:

Check this out from my trip home from work:

This thing was holding on until it crawled onto the roof. I was expecting to see it get tossed.
It “closing ceremonied” my expectations.

It’s actually a good storyline.

And it explains, in real life terms, why stormtroopers in video games will stay aboard a crashing space station to fight the main character when they really should haul plastic behind to an escape pod.

Check out the news that your Miis can be used in Guitar Hero World Tour in the Freestyle mode. There’s a Studio option to record your jammings and share them online. The Miis are a part of this side game. (But all of the features of the XBOX360 and PS3 version are there, too, unlike some third party goofiness.)

Instead of just calling him The Apprentice or, specifically, Vader’s Apprentice, the main character in Force Unleashed now has a name: Starkiller.

What’s funny is that was supposed to be Luke’s last name (check the very bottom).

The character of Luke Skywalker changed greatly during the evolving story of Star Wars. Early versions of Luke were a grizzled war hero of 60, a Jedi Master that would blend the qualities of both the classic-era Obi-Wan Kenobi and the prequel-era Qui-Gon Jinn. The daydreaming farmboy that plunges into a galaxy of adventure was a role filled by Annikin Starkiller in these early drafts.

It’s also interesting that Juno Eclipse is in it, since that was going to be Asaaj Ventress’s name. What I didn’t know, though, was that the Episode III production team had filmed two different death scenes for Shaak Ti and neither got used. She’s still alive and kicking…we’ll see if Starkiller tracks her down.

Shaak Ti’s fate vacillated during the production of Episode III. She was originally scripted as being held captive aboard General Grievous’ flagship at the start of the movie. Assigned to protect the Chancellor, Shaak Ti was also taken prisoner by the Separatists forces. When Obi-Wan and Anakin are investigating the cruiser, they come across a strangely despondent Shaak Ti sitting at General Grievous’ feet. Her spirit broken, Shaak Ti apologizes for her failure, right before she is stabbed in the back and killed by Grievous.

When this sequence was cut from the edit of Episode III, Shaak Ti’s life was spared. She can still be seen in Episode III, as a tiny tabletop hologram on Kashyyyk, when Yoda is remote-conferencing with the Jedi Temple.

During additional photography of Episode III in Shepperton Studios, a scene of Anakin Skywalker killing Shaak Ti was photographed for the sequence of events taking place in the besieged Jedi Temple. This version of events was the basis for how the attack on the Jedi played out in the novelization, which has Shaak Ti in charge of defending the Temple. This scene, too, was cut from the movie.

IGN has a fun take:

If we were behind the scenes at Nintendo though, we’d insist Miyamoto fed ladles of misdirection in a bid to bewilder fellow console makers: “Do you know what I’m most into at the moment? Wool craft and Feudal history”. Then just sit back and watch as Microsoft and Sony race to release Knitwear Warrior to the thunderous indifference of the masses.

Have I told you my undying devotion to Bratz: Girls Really Rock! ?

[whispered] Let’s see if it works again.

Also, a librarian need:

A nonfiction title that will rock a junior higher’s mind.
Recommendations, please! This is my weak area in booktalks.

And we are now on Day 9 of Wii Fit
Height: 6’9″ (although someone asked at work if I got taller…better posture?)
BMI: 28.35
Wii Age: Yesterday’s was 36. I wanted to work out more this morning before work (BOXING!), so I did the shorter body test.
Enthusiasm:

5 Mocking Bowsers…Happily Mocking

And now, for those not interested in Wii Fit:
Americans eat 3 pounds of peanut butter each year.

Check out the awesome runners-up.

The Stats for 7/22/08
Height: 6′9″
Wii Fit Age: 37 (my wife is 24. I am the man.)
Weight: 265.4 lbs
BMI: 28.37
Enthusiasm: 5 out of 5 Miyamotos

and a Fireflower

For the burn in my quads
Balance: 49.5% Left, 50.5% Right (better than the 44.5% Left, 55.5% Right of the first day)

And now for the people who aren’t interested in my stats:

A monkey trying to kiss a cat

The Stats for 7/21/08
Height: 6′9″
Wii Fit Age: 38 (got younger!)
Weight: 267 lbs
BMI: 28.58 (went up 0.02 – ate at group yesterday)
Enthusiasm: Still 5 out of 5 Miyamotos

Balance: Master of the Sun Salutation but Couch Potato of the Stand on One Foot and Flail like a Fool

First off, getting Wii Fit takes some effort and some teamwork. Our credits include:

1. Danjo, for being an expert in all things Red Circle and keeping me text-company at 5:15 in the morning, and clueing us in to the weekly ad in the first place
2. giPIG for watching the kids during the changing of the guard
3. J for setting up my bass, especially since I was 10 minutes late to worship team
4. and most importantly, My Beautiful Wife for tag teaming the line, being excited for the game, and being supportive in the face of wild rantings and general obsessive behavior

How to get a Wii Fit
If you don’t have a Colleen or you don’t have a pregnant wife (remember my first list of research?), the way that we found success was showing up early on a Sunday morning. Watch the weekly ads for Target (ignore Buy n Large …er, Wal-Mart…). Every store must have at least one if it is in the ad. So…Show up early. Ours open at 8 am. I figure if I’m going to be inconvenienced, and its worth doing, go all out. Nothing compares to the time spent in line at Episode II. You call me crazy.
Have you been to Disneyland?
Sometime that morning a Target associate will come out and hand out tickets to the people in line. This avoids the rushing and elbowing and soccer-momming to the electronics department.
I made myself very visible on security cameras so people would know I had been there. But I had to tag out with my wife taking my place since I had to get to worship team.
I guess too visible. As my wife was buying WiiFit, the associates were saying, “There was this big, hairy guy pacing around real early this morning.”

When you first boot up Wii Fit, you may have to do a system update. You’ll also have to synchronize the board. Run the game disc and it will walk you through the process.
My Goals
I know that not everyone is interested in my fitness, so I promise to include other interesting stuff alongside the stats. This is kind of an experiment for me.
You do a body test before you play anything. You also create a user profile complete with height. Yes, it does go to 6’9″ if any other readers are of a superior height. The weight max is 330lbs., so sorry Big Cactus, Fezzik, and Optimus Prime.
Alongside calculating your weight and BMI, it also tests your balance:

This is where my goals come in. I would like to blame it all on my torn right foot fascist ligament, but because of my general lack of balance (I did mention 6’9″, right?) I tore my ligament. So improving my balance is my goal. This looks like a decent route.

The Stats for 7/20/08
Height: 6’9″ (2,057.4 mm)
Wii Fit Age: 43 (as a reference, I am not 43)
Weight: 267 lbs (0.12 metric tons)
BMI: 28.56
Enthusiasm: 5 out of 5 Miyamotos

Balance: Leaning heavily to the right. I will put percentages up starting tomorrow.

1. Closer to the virtual reality we saw in movies in the late 90s
2. Lightsaber moves where your gloved prosthetic hand moves
3. A lot more options for games, like a new Wii Sports

Wii Sports Resort. It’s a whole bunch of beach-themed games, like jet skis and frisbee tossing (see, the new MotionPlus is cool?)
See More Wii Sports Resort Screenshot at IGN.com
But the coolest part of Wii Sports Resort?
1:1 saber duels
See More Wii Sports Resort Screenshot at IGN.com
Look at the dueling sticks.
Blue? Red? Are these Jungian archetypes or was it just Miyamoto saying, “Dude! Lucasarts! Do we have to do it ourselves? Fine, then!”

WiiMusic

I’ve been waiting for this game. Like Guitar Hero/Rock Band, but with 50+ instruments! Woo, orchestra mode! And you can record music videos. Remotes mixed with balance boards, with four people rocking out. The nice thing is the remotes you already have, so no need for a peripheral. And the add-on balance board is just to enhance the drum pedals.

And a WiiSpeak voice chat microphone was announced. Meh, except that this means a greater focus on online multiplayer than previous outings. A new Animal Crossing sounds fun (like The Sims but where everyone is constantly connected in an anime world).

We’re at 1,000 posts. Expect some fun celebrations coming up.

Slade, check out the interview on IGN about Conduit. Online multiplayer, fully customizable controls, and a mockery of World War II shooter games.Yep, that’s pretty much us.

I can’t believe this one slipped under my radar. Monster Hunter is a huge online RPG (although it sounds like Guild Wars).

Much thanks to Jeremy for getting me excited about Wii Sports again. I forgot how cool golf is and I always love when both people get knocked out in boxing.

Day 2 of new contacts – Took me :38 seconds to put them in this morning. Running fast.

And what of spy satellites?

I count five uses of the word “conduit” in the manual so far.

On the topic of “Fringe” – If we’re all a part of some crazy conspiracy, and there’s all these secret organizations out there…Who’s left to play the part of Townsperson #2?

I just hope J.J. Abrams doesn’t mess up Lost like he did while working on MI3. And what’s with the dreadfully mysterious photos? Can he recapture the Cloverfield buzz? Sadly, he’ll probably succeed. Will I follow it? Meh for now.

By the way, Fox. Promising that you have Kurtzman and Orci from Transformers is not a good hook.
“Put the cube in my chest.”
“No, Optimus!”
“My bad.”

J got his Wii today. Simple strategy? Find a store manager who actually tracks his shipments and has a reliable UPS driver who shows up at the same time every delivery.

In your face, Wal-Mart! EBGames beat you out of another big sale.

Three Earth-ish planets have been found. Should be big news. But then Billy Ray Cyrus was on the Today show talking about a photo of his daughter. My daughter wouldn’t let me change the channel so I sat through it. No big deal, right? But now crazy bloggers are calling him an unfit dad because he won’t throw a fit.

fit…Fit…

The Wiis are sold out, again. No worries for me since I have one, but my brother-in-law (Rockstar 2.0, not Rockstar 3.0 beta) was promised one from his wife for Father’s Day. I’m helping him out (thus the Twitters from 4:30am in a Wal-Mart) but I’m trying to get a hold of Wii Fit. While staring at a Wii ad waiting for someone to respond to our cries for help in the electronics section, I became quite familiar with Wii Fit’s features.

How long did we wait at Wal-Mart the first night? Well, we saw the Journey concert series HD ad loops on the TVs five times.

I guess people are buying up entire shipments of Wii Fit and going crazy on eBay. There was one story where two guys walked into a Gamestop and bought 80 copies of WiiFit. Paid cash. Craziness.

It can be determined that Wal-Mart workers still have no clue when video game stuff comes in.

On the topic of 3.0, I did get Firefox 3.0 (see, there are some things you can get, even if there’s a huge line…and it didn’t take forever to download).

I dig the huge back button because, yes, users do actually miss it when they try and click. Users who have been teaching for 30+ years and I have to teach them how to attach documents to an e-mail.

I also like the “Awesome Bar”, giving headlines from your recently visited sites. Pretty cool stuff.
Want in on the fun?

Nice Battle Royale, Slade!
The Conduit by High Voltage Studios is scheduled for the first part of next year. It’s going to have a competitive multiplayer (whatever that means…the press release was written by The Sphinx, I think) and they’re focusing on graphics.

Hopefully they also get good controls.

These guys are the ones who made Leisure Suit Larry and the White Men Can’t Jump officially licensed game. What’s the worst that could happen?

The Haiku
Low expectations
are just one coping technique
used by modern nerds

I forgot that they were going to do the Lifehouse Skit. Always awesome.

The second freedom concert. Very fun. No babies delivered (I think).

My brother and I got River City Ransom on the Virtual Console.

Pros:

1. Two people fighting on the screen simultaneously.
2. Bad Japanese Translations = Very Fun Dialogue (“*OOF BARF!!*” being my favorite from the ‘Generic’ gang)
3. Beating people with tires and crates

Cons:

1. It’s not Double Dragon. It definitely came earlier, especially graphics-wise. It’s from the same company, though.
2. Sauna Nudity
3. 5 bucks.

Still fun, but there are some major glitches. My brother and I must have skipped over quite a bit, even though we were actually trying to play. And the passwords are pretty easy for kids to enter. Here’s ours:

Slade – We missed, like, four bosses. Here’s just the beginning of the FAQ:

The Beginning—————————————–>

Crosstown High School:
Easy enough, just pummel on everyone and grab the cash.

Sticksville #1:
Make sure to grab the trashcan once you’ve cleared the area.

Grotto Mall:
Buy Dragon Feet from the bookstore, and then continue onwards.

Sticksville #2:
Use the railing to stall your opponents, before dealing some serious
death from above! Ignore the path upwards for now, and instead leave via
the right.

Sticksville #3:
Avoid the pit and use the wall to get the drop on the enemies here. Unlike
the other enemy turfs you’ve been on though, there’s only four normal punks
here. Once they’re defeated, we come face-to-face with our first boss!

[%%%]Boss: Moose [07b.1][%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%]
Part of the Mob gang, he’s still not all that tough. Like normal punks,
climbing the wall will freeze him in place, so your best bet is to lure him
towards the middle of the screen, and then go with the death from above
tactic, climbing back up once you’ve knocked him down.
[%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%]

Once he’s out of the way, leave via the way he came in.